And Finally...

Government so small it can fit in your bedroom!

How were they enforcing this?

Is there a limit on total footage? Does a double ended dildo count as two? Is a Christmas tree of dicks ok since it's more than 6, but is Christian?

Yay! More small government and freedom!

The great Republican war on orgasms have begun.

*trying to buy salad ingredients for the family cookout*

The cashier: sorry state prevents us from selling more than 5 cucumbers at a time.

Is there a shortage of dildos in Texas that they need such laws to stop hoarding?

Hypocrites! They do this tomfoolery but make classrooms hang up the approved lord and savior:

I don't know how to make a quote line but this one stood out to me and made me laugh.

"Parents do not consent to their children being exposed to obscene devices while shopping for toothpaste."

What stores sell toothpaste next to adult toys?

I’m guessing they are not limiting the number of guns you can own though.

Why are so many people using them in Walmart?

Yes. Texas bans the possession of or promoting use of more than six dildos.

It does make exceptions for people who have the multiples of the device for medical and law enforcement purposes.

Lmao. Police officers can legally use an array of didos for 'law enforcement'.

You'll be arrested if you cheer them on for it tho...

BUT if you can prove it's medically necessary; you're welcome to have a cornucopia of rubber cocks.

First, they came for the dildos, and I did nothing.

This has very strong “If I can’t make my wife come, nobody will ~~cum~~ come!” vibes.

How...how are they enforcing this?

Snorted and almost choked on my coffee when I scrolled past this.

The worst part about this is that I'd rather Republicans waste time with pointless legislation such as this rather than something damaging that they could actually enforce.

Look, I have SIX perfectly fine dildos, all in their individual velvet pouches. My grandma even gives me a knowing wink when she sees them on my nightstand (she's very with-it, my grandma). But the minute I walk into Walmart and snag NUMBER SEVEN - BAM! 💥 The world implodes. Little Timmy starts twerking in the cereal aisle, the self-checkout beeps incessantly with unholy vibrations, and a rogue bag of gummy worms spontaneously transforms into a life-size silicone replica of the Lone Star State... it's CHAOS, I tell ya! This clearly-reasonable six-dildo limit is PROTECTING our precious Texas innocence. Seven just unleashes the primal urges, and nobody wants that, especially not while picking out a new can of Copenhagen. 🤠

#SixIsTheMagicNumber #TexasStrong #ProtectTheInnocence (and the Gummy Worms)

There are definitely some Texas billionaires that own more than six politicians.

Neo-puritanism needs to die. I'm getting excited because I think humanity is just generally getting fed up with control. We're done with this shit.

At least none of these people should be violent. They can have their views. But law is always violent. So it has no business being an extension of anyone's sexual views. If you violently impose your sexual perspective on others you are as good as a rapist in my book.

Will United Healthcare cover dildos if they are for medicinal purposes?

Rofl, they were afraid for their right to bear arms instead of their right to bear dildos.

The One Star State is at it again. "Freedom" there is not really a thing since the government obviously owns the citizens.

The solution is clearly to set up sex toy libraries.

...They would never interfere with libraries, right?

Sounds like the government wants to hoard most of the dildos to go fuck themselves. 🍆

I would never have thought to go to walmart to buy a sex toy if I hadn't seen them somewhat prominently displayed on my way towards the vitamin aisle.

So its now illegal to have more than 6 bananas in your home in Texas?

Sigh, this is gonna be an awkward call to mom..

The new top post in this community. I hope everyone is proud of themselves. I know I am.

What if it was a dildo-gun?

Ted Cruz ran out and is trying to hoard them all for himself.

So... are there like, auditors? Does the government pay someone to go around and inventory peoples' sex toys? Do you have to register your devices? Are they serialized? Do you have to report them on your state tax return?

Who are these ~~people~~ whackjobs that spend so much time thinking about what other people are doing in their bedrooms?