Imagine walking into a gay bar and it's just Keir Starmer dancing alone to Sweet Caroline
this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
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How do you even dance to Sweet Caroline lmao? Its a belting song not a dancing song.
My mom went to a Sting concert a number of years ago, and I remember she told me about how she kinda laughed when the basically all-elderly audience all started dancing when the man went "♫ Who-oh, I'm an alien, I'm a legal alien, I'm an Englishman in New York... ♫"
BAH BAH BAHHH
When I was in middle school, our gym class had a "ballroom dance" unit. The teacher was obsessed with Neil Diamond, and this was one of the songs. Another was "Beautiful Noise."
I am still traumatized.
How do you get boomers to support Palestine?
Get them to sing "Free Palestine" to "Sweet Caroline".
that actually slaps
Free Paaaalestinee
BAH BAH BAHHHHH
FROM THE RIVER, TO THE SEAAAAAA (THE SEA! THE SEA! THE SEA!)
Palestinian support suddenly massively increases among Boston Red Sox fans.
this man has never been around a non-cishet person that didn't immediately grimace the second he turned away, i guarantee it. that answer was so straight i could build a level house with it.
"Sweet Caroline" is legit the most straight people song I can think of. Like, there are other songs (like Eminem's entire oeuvre) that may be more appreciated by specific sub-demographics, but in terms of wide-ranging straight (white) appeal, it's got to be hard to beat Sweet Caroline.
there are like three songs that every single person in a straight, white club of any variety will know the words to: "All the Small Things," "Mr Brightside," and "Sweet Caroline." ok there are more than that, but watching a lot of hammered undergrads screaming along to all three in a row at the end of a night was formative.
Whelp I had never listened to Mr Brightside until reading your comment so I can’t be that straight and white.
You are seriously downplaying how much Mr.Brightside could make a room of white non-cishet millenials come unglued
I genuinely am, and you can only try to stop me (i'm white non-cishet people with a softspot for mr brightside, plz don't come at me)
Hey two of those are known by gay white people too
Mr. Brightside kills at silent disco
Honestly I don't think I've ever heard the original version of "Sweet Caroline" in full, I swear I have only ever heard other people referencing it
Edit: honestly pretty good, I liked it well enough
I think every baseball stadium is contractually obligated to play it once per game.
It's what they do at the 7th Inning Stretch at Fenway Park in Boston
It's good as a chanting, sing along song, but not as a dancing song.
how hard is it to say something like a cosmo and its raining men? god politicians are stupid
Surprised he didn't say Irish car bomb and "HOT TO GO!"
...but I guess that's more how you get thrown out of a lesbian bar in Belfast
Politician who is trying to appeal to "the gays": Daiquiry and "Toxic" by Britney.
Real answer: Negroni (it tastes bad which makes me sip it) and "Lay All Your Love On Me" by ABBA (it's fun to sing along to).
Realest answer: Beer (it's usually cheapest by the sip) and Sweet Caroline (it's fun to sing along to)
Hard to say what's more embarrassing between this and when he went on a BBC radio show where you choose what songs you'd take to a desert island and pretended he'd pick Stormzy.
RE: the original question I'd get a mojito and do the whole dance from the end scene of Beau Travail 
pretended he'd pick Stormzy.
You cannot fathom the SHOCKWAVES of cringe that just went through me. This CANNOT be real.
This CANNOT be real.
I like how it's the most basic b choices a 70 year old would make.
lol, that not a gay bar Keith, that's a fucking baseball game
I keep reading "Queer Harmer" as "Queer Hammer" and that makes me think of Peter Gabriel's "Sledgehammer"
Imagining black hammer but for queer people now
straight paypig slaves living in the basement of a trap house in Provincetown
Here's the whitest, straightest performance of Sweet Caroline, sung by former Canadian pm Steven Harper and his band the Van Cats. Something to note is that the name of his band is a French pun based on the prime minister's residence, 24 Sussex drive, and 24 in French sounds kinda like Van Cat
Keir Starmer has a cloth-wrapped Portrait of Milo Edwards in his attic
Long Island Iced Tea and Higher by Creed
sorry sorry i'm trying to delete it
Hot sake poured by a cute twink in a kimono and idk some grindcore or some bossa nova. I've never been to a gay bar, but I think I'd go to that one.
I think I know enough about gays to say "Ranch water and Shut up kiss me", would this trick them into voting for me?
dancing queen, but i would only dance with a drag queen.
Where's that one Sweet Caroline remix from forever ago with the drop that sounded like a bass boosted version of the "You fucked up" noise from some game show? Wait a second here it is
Also I'd be double fisting Malört and blasting "Cortar Todo" by Zu
I have no idea what song that is, but that doesn't sound like any gay dance staple I've heard lol
Cider, "Warrior's Dance" by The Prodigy
How can you listen to the prodigy and not want to dance?
is it normal to go to gay bars frequently when you're straight? outside the reasonable scenario of going to one with a gay friend it seems kinda strange
Maybe if you just like going to bars, the likelihood increases? Or it's a gay bar with a strong kink scene, in which case some nights bring everyone in.
When I was growing up, the only bar in town open after 2am was a gay club.
Not that common, no.
Maybe if you live in/near a gayborhood and it's your local. Depends on the vibe.
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Negroni sbagliato and the winner takes it all
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