this post was submitted on 30 May 2024
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politics

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[–] NewLeaf@hexbear.net 47 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The adults are in the room now boys! Le drumf is finished for sure this time!

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 51 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

The walls have closed in. Racism has ended. Fascism is no longer a threat. All’s right with the world.

[–] g_g@hexbear.net 26 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] un_mask_me@hexbear.net 8 points 5 months ago

We really do have the best emotes

[–] CommCat@hexbear.net 10 points 5 months ago

democracy has triumphed! Dems will now rule for 1000yrs! new lib End of History.

[–] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

"God is in His Heaven. Everything is normal on Earth."

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 7 points 5 months ago
[–] utopologist@hexbear.net 42 points 5 months ago

IF YOU'RE IN LINE TO MAKE A JOKE ABOUT TRUMP GETTING CONVICTED, STAY IN LINE

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 40 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Mr. Trump before I sentence you to death I must say, congrats on the sex.

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 6 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Do you think that when his orange chode busts it looks like a creamsicle-flavored bon bon?

[–] g_g@hexbear.net 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 37 points 5 months ago (3 children)

oh neat. another moment in amerikkkan democracy where one unelected judge has the unilateral power to sentence trump to between 0 and 136 years in jail. the choice has profound implications. very cool situation we have here. very popular control of the government for things to develop this way.

[–] footfaults@hexbear.net 27 points 5 months ago

Betting on 0

[–] FungiDebord@hexbear.net 13 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Wow there's no higher court or appellate review or precedent or professional norms constraining a new york trial judge that's crazy

[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

well the really fun part is that those guys tend to be even more conservative and even less accountable.

but i get it, no jokes, the bourgeois justice system does not deserve to be satirized for its relative unaccountability to public scrutiny and review.

[–] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 3 points 5 months ago

Being sarcastic is not sufficient to be satire

[–] Formerlyfarman@hexbear.net 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What are laws for if not for jailing ooosition figures?

[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

i'd personally hit the full 136 just as a bit

[–] Formerlyfarman@hexbear.net 2 points 5 months ago

Well yhea. You cant chiken out at this point.

[–] Finger@hexbear.net 33 points 5 months ago

My guys are solid. They're paid to stand up to the heat.

[–] metaltoilet@hexbear.net 32 points 5 months ago

I'll eat all of my own hair if he spends a day in jail.

[–] Chapo_is_Red@hexbear.net 32 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Kinda curious (and concerned) what he'll do in revenge after he wins. On the bright side, maybe he'll arrest Hillary.

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 29 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It'd be hilarious if he sent all the dems to the Hague

[–] RuthlessCriticism@hexbear.net 14 points 5 months ago

The dutch would just let them go.

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 31 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

It would be so stupid if Dems ran on this by treating it seriously and monologuing sternly about the erosion of our norms and institutions. It would be much more effective to lean into making fun of the case, by saying like, he went through all this trouble to stop Stormy Daniels from telling us that his dick looks like Toad from the Mario games.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)

"Okay, okay - I'm old, jack. But at least my dick doesn't look like Toad from Mario Kart." Gasps from the audience. "And have you seen how big the fuzzy part is of Hunter's naked pics? I'm not one to brag but... like father like son. Even more so." Somebody cheers. MSNBC is scandalized. But that goes away after it positively trends on social media. And after the next poll Biden is up significantly in every swing state. Then Lawrence O'Donnell nicknames Biden "Straight Talking Joe" and he usually follows it up with "And he's not even one to brag. Even more so."

Biden wins in a landslide. And lib media agrees with Chris Hayes who says "It's high past the time that the discourse gets aggressive and yes, even crass at times if needed."

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

More plausible scenario than winning by appealing to decency and saving democracy

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'm serious when I say that Hillary might have won in 2016 if - along with other stuff - she had taken acting classes in an effort to make her performances seem warm and friendly. But even in theory - she would have no agreed to do that. She's too vain and too stubborn to accept that. Even though she saw first hand how her husband won twice by performing. Nobody gives a shit about policy. Voters just want somebody they can relate to.

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, this is why I thought Warren stans were psychotic, when their whole pitch was that she had a policy for everything because she did her homework. And when people mentioned that she was unlikely to be elected in the general they shouted "She's electable if you vote for her!" Same inflexible ramming through of a candidate with paltry normie appeal.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

"She's electable if you vote for her!"

It's funny how the libs slime a leftist candidate as "unelectable" even if there isn't significant polling yet. But a normie dem with a moronic plan that clearly makes them unelectable is described in failure as the voters letting her down.

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah her, Beto, and Buttigieg had these personality profiles and resumes that were catnip to credential-seeking white middle class libs, making them suspend all long term thinking.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 3 points 5 months ago

It was their turn.

[–] jack@hexbear.net 30 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] duderium@hexbear.net 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

IT’S HAPPENING!!!!!!1!1!1

[–] duderium@hexbear.net 19 points 5 months ago

Mister Trump, now listen to me, godfather. The judge, he find-a Mister Trump-a guilty at the trial on-a all-a counts! But then—they suspend-a the sentence! And Mister Trump, he smile at me!

[–] Elon_Musk@hexbear.net 23 points 5 months ago
[–] jack@hexbear.net 21 points 5 months ago

LMAOOOOOOOO

[–] ComradeLove@hexbear.net 14 points 5 months ago

Trump is angling to get sentenced and wind up in Epstein's cell. Then he will find a fingerprint or something to connect Hillary to the murder of Epstein.