this post was submitted on 30 May 2024
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It would be so stupid if Dems ran on this by treating it seriously and monologuing sternly about the erosion of our norms and institutions. It would be much more effective to lean into making fun of the case, by saying like, he went through all this trouble to stop Stormy Daniels from telling us that his dick looks like Toad from the Mario games.
"Okay, okay - I'm old, jack. But at least my dick doesn't look like Toad from Mario Kart." Gasps from the audience. "And have you seen how big the fuzzy part is of Hunter's naked pics? I'm not one to brag but... like father like son. Even more so." Somebody cheers. MSNBC is scandalized. But that goes away after it positively trends on social media. And after the next poll Biden is up significantly in every swing state. Then Lawrence O'Donnell nicknames Biden "Straight Talking Joe" and he usually follows it up with "And he's not even one to brag. Even more so."
Biden wins in a landslide. And lib media agrees with Chris Hayes who says "It's high past the time that the discourse gets aggressive and yes, even crass at times if needed."
More plausible scenario than winning by appealing to decency and saving democracy
I'm serious when I say that Hillary might have won in 2016 if - along with other stuff - she had taken acting classes in an effort to make her performances seem warm and friendly. But even in theory - she would have no agreed to do that. She's too vain and too stubborn to accept that. Even though she saw first hand how her husband won twice by performing. Nobody gives a shit about policy. Voters just want somebody they can relate to.
Yeah, this is why I thought Warren stans were psychotic, when their whole pitch was that she had a policy for everything because she did her homework. And when people mentioned that she was unlikely to be elected in the general they shouted "She's electable if you vote for her!" Same inflexible ramming through of a candidate with paltry normie appeal.
It's funny how the libs slime a leftist candidate as "unelectable" even if there isn't significant polling yet. But a normie dem with a moronic plan that clearly makes them unelectable is described in failure as the voters letting her down.
Yeah her, Beto, and Buttigieg had these personality profiles and resumes that were catnip to credential-seeking white middle class libs, making them suspend all long term thinking.
It was their turn.