this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2024
108 points (97.4% liked)

the_dunk_tank

15910 readers
22 users here now

It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 49 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 74 points 2 months ago (1 children)

So by historical analogy, they want to elect harris, have the chuds start a civil war about it, then have harris stop funding israel's genocide as an exigency of that civil war somehow?

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 55 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Harris wins, Trump declares civil war, Israel recognizes Trump as president and sends troops, the US begins directing the MIC infinite weapons hose to Hamas and destroys Israel?

[–] Justice@lemmygrad.ml 27 points 2 months ago

Ok this made me internally chuckle twice

Once at the Trump "I declare... BANKRUPTCY. Shit, I mean, CIVIL WAR!" mental image

And second at the idea of Israel "sending troops" to the US. I don't know why that's so fucking hilarious. Probably because 80% of them would die in accidents on the way and the ones who managed to land would get shot by racist chuds who hear them speaking Hebrew or accented English and think they're invading Arabs.

Like I'm just picturing that dumb fuck 5 star general, commander of... whatever titles they made up for him... the guy who gave the "tour" of the hospital showing "proof" that Hamas was embedded there and using it for military purposes. That guy landing on a beach in South Carolina, dehydrated, one of the few survivors and he sees the chuds rolling down the beach in an armored vehicle after they detected the incoming watercraft.

They're shining blinding lights on him and over the megaphone demanding like

"Are you a Yankee? Are you with Kamala? Answer or we shoot!"

"No, no, friend! I have come to help fight KHamas! We have great army! Please, can I have some wa-"

"Did that big-head fucker just say he's Hamas? Trump warned us about them! Open fire, boys!"

[–] Dimmer06@hexbear.net 65 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Actually it's kind of an apt comparison. They just don't realize that Lincoln was never really anti-slavery and was only really forced into that position because the Republicans in the Northern states demanded it.

[–] WaterBowlSlime@lemmygrad.ml 22 points 2 months ago

"And that's why you should always vote Democrat! We can push them left!"

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 59 points 2 months ago (1 children)

So they’re saying leftists should use the same tactics abolitionists used to pressure the state into ending slavery? Ah yeah it’s john-brown time!

[–] HumanBehaviorByBjork@hexbear.net 34 points 2 months ago

i seriously am struggling to understand what their position here is if it's not "domestic terrorism is good fine and necessary but you ALSO HAVE TO VOTE"

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 56 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Although he already had a draft emancipation proclamation prepared, Lincoln responded with his own open letter to Greeley, which he published in the National Intelligencer in Washington, D.C. Lincoln stated plainly that the goal of his administration's policies, including those related to slavery, was to save the Union. "My paramount object in this struggle is to save the Union, and is not either to save or to destroy slavery. If I could save the Union without freeing any slave I would do it, and if I could save it by freeing all the slaves I would do it; and if I could save it by freeing some and leaving others alone, I would also do that." Lincoln carefully noted that this represented his official position.

Source: https://www.loc.gov/collections/abraham-lincoln-papers/articles-and-essays/abraham-lincoln-and-emancipation/

He was never the liberator libs make him out to be. He only wanted to free the slaves because it was the only way to prevent the Confederacy from seceding.

[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 31 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

And he had no interest in integrating these newly freed people into US society. He had some weird fixation about shipping them all off to some island or something so he wouldn't have to deal with them, mentioning it several times even after being told it's a bad idea

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago

Yup. Black people freed themselves from white people.

Lincoln just saw the opportunity to get more soldiers to prevent the collapse of the settler project.

[–] heggs_bayer@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago

Isn't that how Liberia originated?

[–] quarrk@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

He only wanted to free the slaves because it was the only way to prevent the Confederacy from seceding.

Isn’t that what directly led to their secession though? Or do you mean it was the only way to rally the North to force the union back together?

[–] GlueBear@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

He needed soldiers to fight for the union to prevent the Confederacy from gaining a victory. In the link I posted, they said that Lincoln already had a draft of the emancipation proclamation ready before he published this letter.

His intention was never to free the slaves, but to preserve the union. One way to gain new soldiers was to declare the slaves of the Confederacy free.

The confederates wanted to keep slavery, the union freed the slaves. If you were a free slave in the Confederacy, who would you fight for? The side that just freed you, or the side that wants to keep enslaving you?

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 49 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I would refrain from posting in the community built around a person outed as a child pornography enjoyer, but I guess some people are different

[–] sisatici@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

Ironically they are quite puritans for anyone except vaush

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 47 points 2 months ago

Well I'm convinced not to vote for Lincoln john-brown

[–] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 45 points 2 months ago

If you haven't read it, "Black Reconstruction in America" by WEB DuBois is an excellent and eye opening book that shows you both how much of a POS Lincoln was really and how Reconstruction could've been far more revolutionary for POC (land redistribution, etc) if it weren't for people like him. (Though Andrew Johnson after him was much worse)

[–] adultswim_antifa@hexbear.net 43 points 2 months ago

Libs are always like "don't worry about the current genocide or the current war, the best time to put pressure on politicians is after they've won the election and there are zero conditions to get our vote. She needs to be free now to make promises to anyone about anything other than whatever it is we care about."

[–] g_g@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

you know what? i'm convinced. they got me.

this November - 2024 - i will be casting my vote

for abraham lincoln.

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Writing in Avraham Linkhalm

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

Abracadabra Lipbalm

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago

thinking-about-it let them cook if Harris' election was going to cause a civil war i think we'd have to strongly consider it

[–] axont@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

trying to make a clumsy analogy and accidentally venerating John Brown in the process (which is the correct position).

also as far as I know Karl Marx congratulated Lincoln on the 1864 election not the 1860 election. By 1864 Lincoln had become more practically anti-slavery compared to his initial platform in 1860. Lincoln repeatedly proclaimed his position was to contain slavery, not eradicate it, but the horrors of the civil war probably changed his mind once he saw the stakes at hand. His 1864 platform included a proposal to end slavery by constitutional amendment.

what is this even supposed to be saying? That a vote for Kamala Harris is actually voting for a ceasefire in Gaza? Harris is currently responsible for a genocide and her platform is to continue support for genocide. She isn't even proposing to limit, contain, or pressure Israel into stopping. She just had a meeting with Netanyahu and shook his hand like three weeks ago. A better analogy would be an alternate reality 1860 Lincoln as a southern democrat with a lifetime of lending aid to slave states, then ran for president in 1860 and said some wishy washy things about how he'll wag a finger at slave owners. But he's been personally selling whips, chains, and plantations to slave owners for decades. Then he invited the largest slave owners of every southern state to a big banquet and shook all their hands. And then I'm told by the 1860 version of Va*sh that Lincoln is actually an abolitionist, or that we can't worry about slavery right now because of other things going on.

i wish these liberals would just come out and say they do not care about Palestinians. Like you could at least say Lincoln was proposing to limit slavery's expansion, and he foolishly believed this would end slavery. Harris and Biden have no proposals whatsoever about Palestine other than give Israel more weaponry and aid. They're not even pretending, they're fiercely pro-Israel in a way that can't be compared to Lincoln's tepid, flawed incrementalism.

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Also he wrote it before 13 amendment was implemented so he probably imagined US abolition to be standard but alas.

[–] MrPiss@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

Yeah the Republicans were definitively the antislavery party but they knew they couldn't legally end it under American federalism. At best they could limit and constrain the spread of slavery and chip away at it at the Federal level, which they knew when running. They were sort of feckless liberals unwilling to break or move outside of the system. Once Sherman had his march to the sea to show the norths resolve and the south was fully militarily occupied then slavery could be abolished fully in the union with the 13th ammendment.

Anyway, the analogy holds no water unless you're politically illiterate.

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 33 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

this is a shit analogy, voting for lincoln didnt stop a civil war and millions of people from dying, so

their whole messaging is voting harris to stop fascism

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 31 points 2 months ago

Literally the dumbest people on reddit-logo

[–] Beetle_O_Rourke@hexbear.net 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] FanonFan@hexbear.net 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

sigh

back in my day the funny clown hammer had a little more spice to it

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Just for you, you filthy animal

"Haha Tacoma is weepin-"
funny-clown-hammer BONKfunny-clown-hammer
You have been bopped with a big funny clown hammer. You are going to the posting gulag for your crimes.

"Lol he said the n-word in a stream and-"
funny-clown-hammer BONK funny-clown-hammer
You have been bopped with a big funny clown hammer. You are going to the posting gulag for your crimes.

"lmao remember when he defended pedophilia by saying it wasn't any more exploitative than making laptops-"
funny-clown-hammer BONK funny-clown-hammer
You have been bopped with a big funny clown hammer. You are going to the posting gulag for your crimes.

Making a post demanding others stop Vaushposting, and then realizing that you yourself have now Vaushposted
funny-clown-hammer BONK funny-clown-hammer
You have been bopped with a big funny clown hammer. You are going to the posting gulag for your crimes.

[–] Speaker@hexbear.net 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

That third bonk is... something.

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

You're looking at some hexbear deep lore right there, blame fanonfan for invoking the deep magicks

[–] FanonFan@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

With just a pinch of sandy cheeks cock vore, just like gramma used to make it

[–] amphibian@hexbear.net 22 points 2 months ago

vaush fans and being historically illiterate? who woulda guessed?

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

More like "if you vote for Stephen A. Douglas, Andrew Jackson or John Calhoun, you're supporting slavery"

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 2 months ago

A Reddit link was detected in your post. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.