this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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[–] CommunistBear@hexbear.net 64 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Weren't Yoda's failures and blindness to what was happening around him part of the reason the empire came to be in the first place? He was too weak to stop Palpatine

[–] KurtVonnegut@hexbear.net 42 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This is literally the same analogy as that "Biden is like Hindenburg" lib from yesterday, who was seemingly unaware that Hindenburg was democratically elected and yet was unable to prevent Hitler from coming to power anyway...

[–] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 43 points 6 months ago

unable to prevent Hitler from coming to power

Weird way to spell "appointed him chancellor".

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 29 points 6 months ago

He was literally the worst jedi leader ever, not only his sat on the council so long he was even titled "grandmaster" (basically a time-based coup), and his overall blind dogmatist position and strings of particularly bad decisions are responsible for most of the order's decline and fall. Again, it was happening over centuries.

[–] wtypstanaccount04@hexbear.net 26 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It was, which is why The Last Jedi had Luke trying to correct the faults of the Jedi, except the movie half-assed it just like every other cowardly decision made in that movie.

[–] autismdragon@hexbear.net 10 points 6 months ago

Somehow its the least cowardly sequel lmao

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 44 points 6 months ago
[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 43 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Do libs inderstamd that fiction isn't real?

I mean Yoda is frail and wise for the same reason he's short and green - somebody made it the fuck up.

People are questioning Biden because he's an old man with dementia. That's real, you can't spin that no matter how many cinematic universe characters you compare him to

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago

Do libs understand fiction isn't real?

"Uhm this is just like Harry Potter! Silly tankies just don't understand we're the adults in the room! :smuglord: "

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 36 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Hillary, in a gold bikini, strangling Trump to death.

[–] emizeko@hexbear.net 33 points 6 months ago (1 children)

go-ahead go ahead, move your mouse to the Stable Diffusion window. go ahead

[–] Tachanka@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago

sicko-instapot let him cook

[–] WittyProfileName2@hexbear.net 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Biden's like Yoda

Incapable of seeing the fascism swelling up in the republic?

Unwilling to acknowledge let alone address systemic injustices?

Like, 1000 years old?

About to self exile to escape his fuck-ups?

[–] xkyfal18@lemmygrad.ml 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] Spongebobsquarejuche@hexbear.net 6 points 6 months ago

Well I give them points at least for it not being a Harry Potter based analogy. Meh.

[–] Storm@hexbear.net 34 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yoda failed Anakin and the Galactic Republic.

[–] KurtVonnegut@hexbear.net 39 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Yoda died alone in a hut, and the last thing he ever did is reveal to his student that he had been rizzing up his own sister for the past four years. And for the past year Yoda ALLOWED his student to rizz up his own sister. So I guess that means Hunter Biden will have to join the Houthis and save the galaxy...

[–] emizeko@hexbear.net 17 points 6 months ago

hahaha this is an incredible post, it would be even better if it called them Ansarallah!

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[–] HelluvaBottomCarter@hexbear.net 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)

NO PUPPET NO PUPPET YOU'RE THE PUPPET

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago

/thread

Oh, man, I laughed!

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 17 points 6 months ago

These days he's CG.

[–] Tachanka@hexbear.net 31 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Joe Biden is a geriatric puppet who lives in a swamp

yeah checks out

[–] Spike@hexbear.net 13 points 6 months ago

And going to die soon

[–] nat_turner_overdrive@hexbear.net 31 points 6 months ago

when nine hundred years you reach, stop fascism you will not

[–] Rojo27@hexbear.net 26 points 6 months ago

Hmm, yeah. Very reassuring to know that he is old and frail like Yoda who passes away by the end of the original trilogy. ~~Not that I'm against Biden just dying.~~

[–] blobjim@hexbear.net 25 points 6 months ago

It's not that far off from the lich king angle they suggested on chapotraphouse.

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 23 points 6 months ago

Fundamentally, change nothing will

[–] FuckyWucky@hexbear.net 21 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

I don't really mind if he can't do push-ups, he can't even speak properly. Something which Yoda can.

[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 15 points 6 months ago

"A big liar, you are. Best government America has seen, mine is."

"Some votes you have lost, it seems? How embarrassing!"

"When 90 years old you are, not so good will you speak, hmm?"

-- 'Master' Biden

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

~~read~~ watch another ~~book~~ movie

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[–] take_five_seconds@hexbear.net 20 points 6 months ago

dementia i have :yoda:

[–] Barx@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago

Ruling class brains right there

[–] nohaybanda@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] Black_Mald_Futures@hexbear.net 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)

ulysses T? more like ulysses teez nutz!!

[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 17 points 6 months ago

Didn't the Trump campaign already confirm that he's a Sith, in that May 4th poster?

[–] Red_sun_in_the_sky@hexbear.net 16 points 6 months ago

They see me in that Bugatti podracer, they hate me, they hate me

[–] tombruzzo@hexbear.net 13 points 6 months ago

Smoking crack in a 2001 Honda Civic feels more like a Hunter thing to do

[–] Utter_Karate@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Biden is actually like Bruce Willis in the Sixth Sense.

[–] PoY@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 6 months ago

actually he is more like Bruce Willis in real life... today...

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago

He's gonna die in a swampy exile after a twink asks him too many questions?

[–] WeedReference420@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It would be cool if Yoda had a Hunter Biden equivalent

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yoda has a son named Yonter. He spends money on gratol, hits the wantrel pipe, and does tons of trobane. His exploits are covered in the Quantumbolids and TMZ. He's also a painter.

[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Biden may be like Yoda and Trump may be like Jabba, but sadly the average voter is like either the Tusken raiders or the affluent arms dealers in episode 8.

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 6 points 6 months ago

Literally Reagan

[–] xkyfal18@lemmygrad.ml 6 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, if anything that old senile bastard is more like Darth Sidious

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