this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
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Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by Emperor to c/badrealestate
 

Business at the front, party at the back.

I have looked it over a few times and am still confused about everything stuffed in the back garden - an extension for tiny pottery houses, a converted bathyscaphe, a fountain that looks like it came from a funfair and a tree house. All that before you get to the loft conversion that has the feel of a small caravan (we used to go on holiday in a Sprite). 🤷‍♂️

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[–] GreatAlbatross 17 points 2 days ago

Somebody didn't get the memo: OSB is not a sensible wall finish.

[–] Zip2 23 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

That photo gallery really is the gift that keeps on giving.

“Renovated to the highest standard”. Not my highest standard, that’s for sure. I’m not a fan of the chipboard look.

it boasts hand-crafted structures

Yeah, no kidding!

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 days ago

That was an interesting ride.

It starts out, as I was acrimony scrolling down the page, "oh, that's a pretty house."

Then it was "well, not everyone likes a lot of wood accents, but that's still up my alley.

Then, "oh, that's an interesting choice. Just needs better execution."

Then "ooooookay, definitely an odd set of choices"

Then "what the absolute fuck were they thinking?"

Imo, that listing is the poster child for this C/

[–] ScreamingFirehawk 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Looks like the estate agent wasn't brave enough to create a floorplan

[–] Emperor 11 points 2 days ago

Or it's impossible to map without resorting to the kind of non-Euclidean geometry that would open doorways to entities that cannot be named.

[–] mp3@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Mirror? I think the listing has been removed..

Sorry... We can’t show your page

[–] Emperor 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)
[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Even got that error there.

Tried it in both Firefox and a Chromium browser.

[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The earlier capture (the one I did) still works. I've added the link to the original post.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The link works! Also, "open the pod bay doors please, HAL."

(And would it have killed them to at least paint the plywood?)

[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago

Apparently it would.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The Internet Archive has two captures - the earlier one is the one I grabbed and still works.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Thanks, that worked. I actually think that's a really cool and unique house. I like a lot of what they did there.

Those pictures are so deep fried that some of them are difficult to look at. Whomever took those needs to chill out with the sliders.

What's up with the TV in the bedroom? It looks like it's about twice as wide as a normal TV. Do they make ultrawide TVs, or are they committing some sort of fuckery with this photography, stretching the room out to make it look larger?

[–] baggins@beehaw.org 1 points 2 days ago

I get the same error on there as well 😕

[–] Sergio@slrpnk.net 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Works for me now. Seems like a zany place, kind of fun tho.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'm getting the same error.

[–] Sergio@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Woah, I tried again and now I get the error. Maybe their server's being overloaded or something.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Well I'm glad the error is happening today because I was literally just using that site yesterday. Didn't end up needing it yet, but still...

[–] Sergio@slrpnk.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Oh that's right! You can go check out these houses irl! How is it over there? Have they sold your data to Palantir yet?

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Haven't moved quite yet. We're leaving on Monday evening, so I have just enough time to see the rapist turn America into a Fascist Dictatorship from the inside.

We pushed the schedule up because we're worried that when he starts mass deportations, people who are even here legally will freak the fuck out and grab the next plane out of the country and I won't be able to get a ticket. Also we think it will be much easier for me to find someone willing to hire me from within the UK and with a UK phone number.

Maybe all the worrying will be for nothing. One of my elderly British relatives, who is not conservative, said I have Trump phobia. Maybe so. Maybe this is all panicking for nothing. Or maybe I'm saving my daughter from kristalnacht. I don't feel like it's worth gambling if I don't have to.

Anyway, we're going to end up in a VRBO in Blackburn, Lancashire for a month while I look for work, so I guess I'll know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.

[–] Sergio@slrpnk.net 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It doesn't mean you have a phobia, just: this is a great excuse to see another part of the world, give your kid a bit more perspective, get in touch with your heritage, etc.

Just make sure you catch that flight!

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

You can count on it!

[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Maybe all the worrying will be for nothing. One of my elderly British relatives, who is not conservative, said I have Trump phobia.

I remember an American postgrad I was teaching talking with horror about George W. Bush (the president at the time), and he seems positively cuddly compared to Trump. It may all be bluster, but it could be a Handmaid's Tale prequel and I don't think I'd want to roll the dice on it.

Anyway, we’re going to end up in a VRBO in Blackburn, Lancashire for a month while I look for work

You are only about an hour away, so if you get in a pickle let me know.

It's well located for Manchester, Liverpool (a current hotbed of the creative industries) and Leeds. You'll find the cost of living is cheaper and the people friendlier Up North. Good luck. 🤞

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Thanks so much for the offer. I have a lot of family and friends over there who can help me too. And yeah, I'd rather not risk it considering my daughter is queer.

[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

No worries - Blackburn family? The comment from your elderly relative makes sense in the accent!

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Only a couple of cousins, but no, that relative is actually not right-wing at all and he's highly educated. He's just also a pre-Boomer. He lived through WWII but he was too young to remember it. I just don't think he believes it could possibly happen again.

"Honey, you'll never believe the deal I just got for some particle board!"

[–] celeste@kbin.earth 3 points 2 days ago

That little round room is super cute! could never live in it cause of the claustrophobia, but a different me would be into it. The rest of the place is very...????????

It feels like something out of The Prisoner. Who is number one?

[–] blackbrook@mander.xyz 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I wonder where they got the tardis.

[–] Emperor 3 points 2 days ago

You don't get a TARDIS, the TARDIS gets you.

[–] Maalus@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

The sink + kitchen furniture in a bedroom is a choice for sure

[–] proudblond@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What’s a “snug” in this context? When it listed it as a feature, my American brain thought it was an adjective but clearly they mean a type of room.

[–] scholar@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

A small room to be snug in

[–] __nobodynowhere@startrek.website 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] scholar@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Potentially, but also a reading nook, napping place, quiet conversation area... basically just a smaller, cozier living room

[–] xuxxun@beehaw.org 3 points 2 days ago

Looks quite bizarre but fun

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

The listing appears to have been removed.