this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2024
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I've been in Southeast Asia and China for a minute and I never get tired of seeing passport bros, sexpats, gamers, and chuds, get nicked by the ladies out here.

A lot of SEA and Chinese women can be absolute alpha predators. Especially the ones that work in sex tourism industry out here.

An elaboration:

Imagine, if you can, being so much of a loser that you think Southeast Asian women would make good "trad" wife. So you pack up, fly out, and with no ability to learn a foreign language, no drip or rizz, you waddle out to the nearest club or bar.

You're wearing a 9 Line shirt, cargo shorts, and hiking boots with lifts. Your hair is in an emergency Norwood Reaper category 12. The Thailand heat is making a weird slime or gunk build right under your gunt and your feet are starting to sweat.

You get to the bar and she spots you like a ripe zit on a Union Electricians left ass cheek. She waltzes up to you and asks "How long you been here sexy man?". This is how it starts and it's the beginning of your end.

A few months go by and you've lost count of how much money you've spent. She spends her nights working, which you don't like, but you do get some loving every now and then, so you're happy. You even bought a little home in the country side, in her name of course, with the understanding that she'll marry you.

You can smell that "trad life" around the corner. One day, she doesn't answer her phone, you can't find her. You show up at the bar she works at and she's not there. You decide to show up at the home you bought, thinking maybe she's going to surprise you—and she does.

You knock on the door and there she is, with her actual boyfriend. It all hits you all at once—your money and status as an American don't matter. You're too stupid to figure out why you suck at getting women and too indoctrinated in the MGTOW, chud, and red pill podcasters to figure it all out.

The balcony is your only friend now.

top 35 comments
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[–] curbstickle@lemmy.dbzer0.com 60 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I see you've met my moron of an uncle. Who is in his late 50's.

[–] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 13 points 1 week ago

My wife's grandfather. That lady is like first gen feminism.

Well ol Grandpappy sent much of his life savings to sponsor a Asian wife, getting her a house and a new car. Then he was ready to leave my grandmother to start a new life. But Grandma found bank statements and they divorced and got mucho of the split.

He tried to live with his sponsored Asian wife, who ended up being a story like OPs.

Grandpa fucked around and found out he is now homeless.

[–] DankDingleberry@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago
[–] superduperpirate@lemmy.world 38 points 1 week ago (1 children)

“Getting nicked” as in getting pickpocketed, swindled, or otherwise taken advantage of?

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 16 points 1 week ago
[–] Hugin@lemmy.world 34 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'm going to regret this but what is a gunt?

[–] redhorsejacket@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago

I'm speculating, but I believe that's a portmanteau of "gut" and "cunt"...

[–] zbyte64@awful.systems 12 points 1 week ago

Male FUPA. The lower abdomen above the genitals that is extra fatty on the individual.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago

This is hilarious. I especially liked the "no drip or rizz, you waddle out to the nearest club or bar". I could hear the SpongeBob footsteps.

[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Why are you being nasty to short people?

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I just think this is sad.

This is a person who believes if they go to Southeast Asia, they can easily find a life partner who fits their expectations about what that means

There's nothing intrinsically wrong about that - it's very naive, but only that. It's not intrinsically racist or sexist - they might also be racist and sexist, in which case I'll feel significantly less bad for them.

They might also just be genuinely clueless and/or neurodivergent... Propaganda works. Especially on those who haven't been inoculated through experience or instincts

[–] Seleni@lemmy.world 15 points 6 days ago

Dude… these guys go there because us western women are ‘too woke’, ‘too feminist’, ‘don’t understand traditional gender roles’ (i.e. we refuse to be a housebound sex slave) etc, etc.

They’re told that women in X country (Mexico, Japan, and Thailand are the usual culprits listed) are submissive, traditional, uneducated, and you can just buy one, instead of, you know, actually working at building a relationship.

They don’t bother to learn the culture. They don’t bother to even learn the language. They believe that, because they’re white, all they have to do is show up and wave money around and every woman will fall all over their epic alpha maleness.

These guys are just gross.

[–] Humana@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If anyone wants to see this in video form watch 90 Day Fiance on TLC. The Ukrainian women seem to be the ultimate masters of it.

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 6 points 1 week ago

I love Eastern European and Vietnamese women for this very reason.

[–] asbestos@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 8 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] AhismaMiasma@lemm.ee 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Who hurt you and how did someone so "small" do it?

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 0 points 6 days ago

They bit my shins.

[–] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] asbestos@lemmy.world 69 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It’s an official document issued by a government identifying a citizen, certifying his or her nationality

[–] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 53 points 1 week ago
[–] Maiq@lemy.lol 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] obviouspornalt@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 6 days ago

But that's not important right now.

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 24 points 1 week ago

A sex tourist

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A degenerate that can't attract women in his own country.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

Im sure he could. Plenty of prostitutes all over. It’s just in his country he can understand what she’s saying to her friends about him

[–] asbestos@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

A specific occurrence and what happened I guess, something worth noting idk I’m just trynna fill my lemmy comment quota

[–] vordalack@lemm.ee 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I edited the post and added something relevant. It's based on way too many true stories in Thailand and Vietnam.

[–] asbestos@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

You get to a bar and she spots you like a ripe zit on an Union Electricians left ass cheek.

Man you have a way with words, thanks for the laugh

[–] Benjaben@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

This is the exact line I was gonna quote too lol, this story is very specific and fun to read