this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] impudentmortal@lemmy.world 159 points 6 months ago (2 children)

She said her homeowner's insurance won't cover anything pest-related because they deem it preventable.

So the real monster was the insurance company. What a twist!

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 59 points 6 months ago (1 children)

well, that's one way to get a kid to be afraid of bees.

Poor kid. hope she never got stung? doesn't sound like she did.

[–] Takios@discuss.tchncs.de 22 points 6 months ago (4 children)

In elementary school, our gym got infested by bees or wasps (don't remember exactly) and they were everywhere. We still were forced to do sports class in there. I got stung twice and then ran outside, bawling my eyes out. I'm now in my 30s and have a severe phobia of bees, wasps and hornets. Bumblebees are fine though for some reason.

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 16 points 6 months ago

Because bumblebees are cute and just want to play?

Sorry you had to deal with that. Your school should be ashamed.

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

My parents forced me to play outside when I was very young, and I didn’t want to. Stepped on what’s probably a mud wasp nest, and two wasps circled my leg and stung me a bunch. I cried a lot.

Anything yellow and black bug near me makes me MAD DASH AWAY. I got made fun of for a long time, “oh they won’t hurt you, just ignore them”

Like motherfucker I CANNOT IGNORE THEM YOU TWAT

I love fluffy bumblebees though. I still panic before I confirm fluff.

[–] Takios@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

“oh they won’t hurt you, just ignore them”

Oh yeah I got hit with this a lot. But I have empiric evidence of the contrary right in my memory! D:

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love it when people tell me that "they don't like loud sounds" like motherfucker im pretty sure these fucks can't hear noise.

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[–] dumbass@leminal.space 40 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] Kraven_the_Hunter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 36 points 6 months ago (1 children)

So she was basically correct.

[–] awwwyissss@lemm.ee 23 points 6 months ago (4 children)
[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

What if 60,000 of them collectively formed the shape of another creature for the express purpose of terrifying a child? 🤔

[–] AlexanderESmith@kbin.social 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That's basically a character on Rick and Morty (except its like a million ants)

[–] djsoren19@yiffit.net 27 points 6 months ago (2 children)

60,000 of anything is basically a monster. I wouldn't even want to be confronted by 60,000 koalas.

[–] DontTreadOnBigfoot@lemmy.world 22 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago

Title of your autobiography!

[–] DoucheBagMcSwag@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

60,000 Guinea pigs

Prepare to be wheeked to death

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[–] MeekerThanBeaker@lemmy.world 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That's exactly what a bee would say. 🐝🤔

[–] awwwyissss@lemm.ee 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Shh! Don't make us sting you 😤

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[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

If they're pissed off enough to swarm in the tens of thousands, they are temporarily..

[–] nulluser@programming.dev 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

FYI. The quantity of bees in a hive has more to do with their ability to find good food sources nearby, and the suitability of the place they've made their home, and nothing to do with their temperament. That size hive would not be considered particularly remarkable in an apiary. A "swarm" of bees is actually just a bunch of bees that split off from a successful hive and are looking for a new home and are typically very docile. Since this colony had a home (these people's house), it was technical not a "swarm."

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

Thanks for enlightening me, I sit corrected 😁

[–] SomeoneElse@lemmy.ca 28 points 6 months ago

When I was very little, maybe 2, my mum had sat me down in front of Sesame Street while she did some chores. Not long after I came running into the kitchen “mummy mummy there’s a birdie in the front room!” She said yes, that was big bird and to go back in and watch it. I kept running back to her increasingly more upset about the birdie until she came into the living room to find a pigeon had come down the chimney and was irately trying to escape. I know I was too young to remember it, but I swear I can recall the feeling of vindication!

[–] KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 6 months ago

my favorite fun fact about bees and bee nests, is that they actually produce a lot of heat, so if you have a nest of bees in your wall, you can tell because your wall will be hot.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Meanwhile, the Beekreeper escapes the scene unnoticed and prepares to summon its apian horde elsewhere.

[–] Carighan@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago

Shoutout to the absolutely fantastic pen&paper RPG "Heart" in which one of the classes is the Deep Apiarist. Including the ability to have the bees crawling through your body that doubles as their hive animate it while you sleep, allowing you more active hours a day.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 18 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Had something similar. My bedroom was small and under the roof, and for some time I heard scratching noises at night over my bed. I assumed that were mice, so I set up some mouse traps in the attic. No success. The bait was gone, but none of the traps were sprung.

So, one evening when the noise got annoying, I went to investigate closely. And found a large wasps nests, right on the other side of the sheet rock of my bedroom.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This is why flamethrowers are legal to own in 48/50 US states.

[–] afox@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I have a drone on offer up and some fool tried to convince me to trade for a flame thrower. Wtf am I going to do with a flame thrower? I guess I could vanquish my enemies... If I had any. People are weird.

[–] Mesophar@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It seems they had the same thought "Crap, what can I do with this flamethrower? Maybe I can trade it for that drone!"

[–] nednobbins@lemm.ee 2 points 6 months ago

The obvious solution is to attach the flamethrower to the drone.

[–] Cavemanfreak@lemm.ee 6 points 6 months ago (4 children)

Jesus. That sounds eerily like my experience. Heard scracthes in the attic and thought it was mice. Woke up one morning with a dead wasp in the bed and having been stung. Thought nothing of it. Woke up a few days later with two dead wasps in the bed and having been stung. Huh, that's weird. Then when I woke up one morning I saw a wasp crawl between the planks in the ceiling. Called exterminators and they sprayed the attic. The wasps had built their nest in the isolation and had chewed through it down to the planks... The next week I had hundreds of dead (and a few alive) bees in the room every day and I had to sleep on the sofa..

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[–] msage@programming.dev 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I can't believe it's not posted here yet, so here we go.

Ehm.

NO, NO, NOT THE BEES! ALL OVER MY EYES! AARGHHH

[–] Sizzler@slrpnk.net 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] Hupf@feddit.de 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This looks like a job for... DR. BEES!

[–] Dremor@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

As reported by the Bee Bee, See.

[–] ettyblatant@lemmy.world 10 points 6 months ago

!twosentencehorror@sh.itjust.works

This is the worst thing I've read today

[–] cranberryjam@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 6 months ago

Oh man, just heard about this in my beekeeping class.

[–] Lexam@lemmy.ca 8 points 6 months ago

So she was obviously lying and maligning the bees.

[–] rhythmisaprancer@kbin.social 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Too soon to watch Bee Movie?

[–] MeekerThanBeaker@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] swab148@startrek.website 2 points 6 months ago

Ya like jazz?

[–] 8BitFriendly@kbin.run 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

My suitcase full of BEES should help with that!

[–] wieson@feddit.de 3 points 6 months ago

Behold my children:

Saylor Class, Dance Lesson, Computer Science Tutorial and Intro To Biology

[–] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Has this been happening for a while? How tf did this happen?

[–] nulluser@programming.dev 11 points 6 months ago

It's not that uncommon. When a beehive is doing really well, it'll "split", meaning they'll raise a second queen and the new queen will leave and half of the colony will go with her to establish a new hive somewhere. This is called swarming, and it's the their version of reproduction. (Tangent: Contrary to popular belief, honey bee swarms are usually very docile since they don't yet have a home to defend.) Once they find a suitable location to settle, they'll move in. Without humans building things, a suitable location would usually be something like an old hollowed out tree. But humans build great beehive homes. Old houses with small openings between siding panels that allow bees into the walls are a common favorite.

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