this post was submitted on 05 Mar 2024
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What is a gender neutral replacement for man, guys, buddy, etc? (lemmy.ca)
submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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So I've realized that in conversations I'll use traditional terms for men as general terms for all genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I've been thinking that it's not as inclusive to women/trans people.

For example I would say:

"What's up guys?" "How's it going man?" "Good job, my dude!” etc.

Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y'all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.

So what are some better options?

Edit: thanks for all the answers peoples, I appreciate the honest ones and some of the funny ones.

The simplest approach is to just drop the usage of guys, man, etc. Folks for groups and mate for singular appeal to me when I do want to add one in between friends.

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[–] cyborganism@lemmy.ca 171 points 8 months ago (9 children)

y'all

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 70 points 8 months ago (5 children)

Y'all doesn't get enough love. It is gender neutral and extremely versatile.

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 29 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Vosotros agrees.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Ustedes if you're less formal or you live outside Spain 😁

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 3 points 8 months ago

if you're less formal

What a fun way to phrase that. You're not wrong but it's making me giggle.

[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 6 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Or in German: euch

[–] cyborganism@lemmy.ca 23 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm under the impression that you pronounce it the same way this cat looks.

[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You know... that's about right.

[–] cyborganism@lemmy.ca 3 points 8 months ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

[–] Resol@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

I still wonder why English (a Germanic language) doesn't have its own pronoun for the plural 2nd person like German (euch) or Dutch (jullie), I think it kinda helps with distinction between talking to one person and talking to multiple people.

The problem is... what pronoun should we choose? I think "yinz" would sound kinda cool, but nobody outside of a very specific spot in the US actually uses it (other than myself I guess).

[–] sxan@midwest.social 19 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I agree. It's the plural of "you" that should be the official standard, since it disambiguates "you." It can even be broadened to include larger groups via "all y'all," as in, not just y'all in talking to, but all y'all in the house.

It can replace "guys", but not "man," though.

[–] jungle@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

The plural of you is yous or ye. In Ireland at least.

[–] MadBob@feddit.nl 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

It sounds cringeworthy if you're not American though. The standard way of saying it is "you lot" and other dialects, like mine, have "yous".

[–] flicker@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Here where I'm from in the US, you occasionally hear a "y'alls" and now I'm going to start using it as a cultural gap between your dialect and mine.

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Where I’m from people just assume you’re a hick is you say y’all. It’s not very common in the northern, out Midwest of the US, but everywhere in the south.

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It's become the go-to in my company

[–] clif@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Do you work with me? I'm in the US south and my EU colleagues love "y'all" and have started using it (ironically or not :) pretty often.

Warms my heart.

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

I have no hint of a Southern accent, but when I moved here "y'all" became almost an instant part of my vocabulary.

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago

A LOT of my company is remote, but we are headquartered in Providence Rhode Island.

[–] Purplexingg@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I can't do it, I don't want to sound like I'm from the South.

[–] Zitronensaft@feddit.de 4 points 8 months ago

If everyone starts using it, it won’t sound southern any more. C’mon, you know you want to.

[–] hglman@lemmy.ml 1 points 8 months ago

Take it from them!

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

And, for larger groups, all y'all.

[–] Pulptastic@midwest.social 9 points 8 months ago (2 children)

you'uns

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Youse if you’re a Geordie.

[–] BlueEther@no.lastname.nz 2 points 8 months ago

further down under you may hear "hey, yous lot..."

[–] survivalmachine@beehaw.org 2 points 8 months ago

Or if you're near Pittsburgh, "yinz" is the proper spelling/pronunciation.

[–] ieightpi@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I use y'all a lot and im near Chicago

[–] Cagi@lemmy.ca 16 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

I've started using it and I'm Canadian.

[–] greenhorn@lemm.ee 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I've started using it and I'm north of Canada ... In Detroit

[–] azimir@lemmy.ml 3 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Did you know that you can be north of Canada ... in California?

https://qph.cf2.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-75f887668c7f322a0dd1a226e128cea3

[–] greenhorn@lemm.ee 6 points 8 months ago

At a more northern latitude than part of Canada. Detroit is directly north of part of Canada

[–] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 2 points 8 months ago

What in the world. They need to fix that on the next patch.

[–] Nemo@midwest.social 1 points 8 months ago

Me too, but I'm from 'round Minnesota so it's more like ja'll.

[–] Emma_Gold_Man@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

For those not in the US south and afraid of being judged, "all" on its own is an option.

"Hi all" is unlikely to raise any eyebrows

[–] MBM@lemmings.world 1 points 8 months ago

"Hi everybody!"

[–] inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Bingo. I use y'all for everything. Even the singular. It's casual, neutral and relaxed.

[–] Carighan@lemmy.world 0 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Scott the Woz on Lemmy? :o

[–] cyborganism@lemmy.ca 1 points 8 months ago

"Hey y'all, Scott here."