this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2025
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If your pet became president, what would be its first decree? (hexbear.net)
submitted 2 weeks ago by UmbraVivi@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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My dog would immediately deport all mailmen regardless of nationality. She deems them to be an existential threat.

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[–] kittin@hexbear.net 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Immediate death to all vacuum cleaners and the humans must be on the couch at all times except when I want to be alone.

The food bowl cannot be empty. The other cat cannot eat from the food bowl.

The other cat must die.

The other cat must clean my ears.

The other cat must warm me when I’m cold.