this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2023
20 points (62.2% liked)

Unpopular Opinion

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I don't know why they're so popular. They suck (pun intended). I've been given plenty and they ranged from outright terrifying (too much teeth!) to just kinda meh. I'd rather get a handy than a BJ.

all 44 comments
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[–] Selmafudd@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

OK time to share too much. Before we were married my now wife gave me a bj so good I literally shit myself.

I'm not taking any questions, goodbye.

[–] massacre@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

Is there a chance you were trying not to poop for 3 days during a camping trip?

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

And she still married you?! Damn. That's true love.

[–] Oneeightnine 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine the ego boost knowing you're so good at your craft that you made the man spontaneously and literally lose his shit. I'd never let him forget that I hold that sort of power.

[–] cooopsspace@infosec.pub 4 points 1 year ago

And you can't even tell anyone because you and your husband would die from literal embarrassment until the end of time.

[–] Selmafudd@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah 20 years last Wednesday

[–] GBU_28@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

U took a shit then you took a question

[–] Betch@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It really depends. Some people are good at giving BJs and some aren't. Most girls I've been with weren't all that good and rarely made me cum from it alone. It was mostly just to get warmed up, pussy always felt much better.

A couple years ago I got a BJ from this dude tho and it was just like god damn bro 😂. That shit felt fucking amazing, this guy knew what he was doing and I gained a whole new appreciation for blowjobs. Haven't received one that good since tho.

[–] lietuva@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Betch@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Yeah I guess you could call it that but he wasn't really a bro he was just some dude behind a dumpster.

[–] clegko@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I have this theory that same-sex people have better spontanious sex because they know what they like and apply that to their partner.

[–] HappySashimi@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Oha@lemmy.ohaa.xyz 2 points 1 year ago

Should have used docker

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The licks and kisses do a lot

Ps. If youre a dick haver, ask your partner to try sucking as they would on a straw, that pressure does things to you.

[–] willya@lemmyf.uk 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

The only thing unpopular about this opinion is that it’s in the form of an absolute. There’s so many factors for a good BJ. You haven’t had that combo yet.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well... I haven't tried the grapefruit method yet.

[–] willya@lemmyf.uk 3 points 1 year ago

lol, well there’s better tools for that than a grapefruit, but bring it up, show the video. Maybe you discover a citrus fetish.

Sounds like the one that gave you a bj was bad at it.

[–] Ubettawerk@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 1 year ago

A good bj requires a combo of mouth, hands, and enthusiasm from the giver imo

I see you choose violence today.

[–] MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

I dated someone for 12 years and she really got to learn me. It takes open honest communication of what you like and don't like. In the end those were better than sex.

[–] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Best one I received she was did a lot of long licking with eye contact. It was sexy AF.

Edit: Standing up hand in the pants handjob is hot too. It's all foreplay. Build up the tension. Tease. Enjoy. That's how you get good feeling blowjobs/eaten out/handies/fingering.

[–] SmashingSquid@notyour.rodeo 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I think it depends on how sensitive you are. I don’t find getting a bj pleasurable but I’ve had guys moaning “ohhh fuck oh fuckkkkk” when giving them.

[–] Orbituary@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Girth and length are also a thing. As well as the mouth size and technique. Communicate to the sucker!

I've had a handful of memorable bjs, but most are rough.

[–] JSocial@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What was the technique that caused that response?

[–] SmashingSquid@notyour.rodeo 1 points 1 year ago

Nothing special, just normal deep throating.

[–] HeyJoe@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think the craziest part about this is how you enjoy handies... there is a lot of factors in a bj that would make everyone's experience different but a handy is a handy and I've basically told people to stop because they are just that awful.

As someone who has been with the same person for over a decade there are incredible life changing bjs and then ones where I am just trying to finish as quick as possible because you can tell their heart just isn't in it. With that said I would never turn one down!

[–] Zippy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

A good BJ usually includes a good handy. If you like the latter alone then a BJ should just be that much better.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When it comes to head, dudes are best 🤷‍♂️

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I sure like giving them, I just don't like getting them. From guys or girls.

[–] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago
[–] EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 year ago

Different strokes for different folks

I'd rather just fuck, forget about the BJ/HJ. If she wants to be eaten out, no problem I'm down. But personally, I have no interest in the appetizer, give me the main course. It doesn't do it for me.

But I've been with my first girlfriend for 10 years so I might not have enough experience to make an informed decision.

[–] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Never did it for me either. It took my gf a long time to realize that she wasn't doing anything wrong, I just don't get a lot out of oral sex. I'd take a good hand job over mouth stuff any day when it comes to foreplay. Different strokes (heh) for different folks

[–] Neomega@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I agree. It's fine as foreplay, but I had a gf get legit mad at me because she couldn't make me cum with just a bj.

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 3 points 1 year ago

Wow, that's dumb.

[–] xc2215x@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

This will piss people off but do what feels good for you.

[–] Nioxic@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 year ago

You you let her practise

[–] Taako_Tuesday@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago

Yup, this is indeed unpopular. But I imagine if teeth bother you that it might not be that pleasant

[–] Krudler@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I've had 2 good BJs in my life and even then I would have preferred penetration.

Completely agree... for all the whining women do about how men don't know how a clit works, not one woman apparently knows what to do with a penis.

I am absolutely with you. It tickles. Where you give the blowjob it just tickles me so i loose any interest. Give me the real thing. I really don’t need that. If she is erected the pheromones are enough to get me running.