Teen Relationship Advice

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An English-language community for people ages 13-19 to ask for advice on relationships.

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insomniacalmond@lemmy.blahaj.zone

friend (14f) wants her best friend’s bf (14m) to date her (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 1 day ago by galactic@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/teenrelationship@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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my friend lisa has liked this one guy michael for a while now, even before michael met his gf ella.

michael is a good friend of hers that usually calls her and is in our friend group.

once ella came into town and moved here, lisa and ella became pretty close, and ella joined the friend group as well.

ella and michael also became pretty close, calling each other, talking every day, and the like. ella started to like michael, and lisa, hoping that michael was not interested, agreed to help her friend.

turns out michael did like ella, because they’re dating. now that he’s taken, lisa likes him more, because you know what they say: people want what they can’t have.

lisa tries talking to michael a lot and also hoping to take him from ella and get him to break up with her because she’s jealous of ella though, and she’s always like “heyyy michael 🤭 👀 how are youuu”

i get how it feels to have a crush, but what should i do if this continues to happen? should i just tell lisa that it’s wrong: i think she already knows that but feels she has to.

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[–] blackstampede@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

At 14, they should know how to share their toys.

[–] lurch@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago

but can michael endure the shenanigans of two 14 year olds 😆

[–] nesc@lemmy.cafe 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Are you close enough to talk about it? Just ask her if she likes michael and has plans for him, also unless you are sure better not to involve yourself, it can backfire and you will be the one to take all blame. 🥴

[–] galactic@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 day ago

okay tysmm :)

[–] nieceandtows@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Bad idea. Talk some sense into her.

[–] galactic@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 day ago

i will, tysm. i want her to kinda get the other guy she likes 😭

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

should i just tell lisa that it’s wrong

Yes, in a tactful non-accusatory way. However, that's a tricky skill to master even for us grown ass adults so the chance of her taking it not well or in an accusatory way is high. It's possible the friendship won't survive

That being said, y'all are 14/15 that's the age for this kind of social experimentation and learning. You've probably heard it a million times from adults, but it's true, the relationships at your stage in life really won't matter by the time you reach your 20's. It just doesn't feel like it while you're in the midst of it. Relationships at this stage are extremely volatile if it wasn't this breaking them up it'll just be something else, try not to get too bogged down by it.