this post was submitted on 23 Jan 2025
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[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 34 points 1 week ago (2 children)

if humans could make milk would u drink it

[–] Hermes@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] REgon@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

That's the point

[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 24 points 1 week ago (1 children)

no but i'd probably get dysphoric that i couldn't lay eggs

[–] TheGenderWitch@hexbear.net 17 points 1 week ago

goddammit not new dysphorias

[–] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 17 points 1 week ago

it depends on if I liked them or not.

also, if they built their nest in my territory.

there would be an elaborate dance prior, of course. I'm not a maniac.

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago
[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Why not don't waste nutrients

[–] FunkyStuff@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago (4 children)
[–] BobDole@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

You don’t know me

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago
[–] carpoftruth@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

Bread and beer are both only good because of yeast poop

[–] mechwarrior2@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago
[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

feel like the consensus would be "no" and also fewer people would eat non-human eggs

[–] crime@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

just like how few people drink non-human milk

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

you're not wrong, I just think "there's a nonzero chance of a human embryo in there" would make the association hit harder

[–] TheFinalCapitalist@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago

i hate that ive thought this, but dont humans already lay non fertilized eggs?

[–] hihi24522@lemm.ee 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I mean I’d definitely be curious to try it, but I’m not the biggest fan of eggs to begin with, and it’s likely these would be useful for recipes that normally call for multiple eggs rather than like an egg on toast and what not.

However, I’d like to note that if humans are laying eggs at like the rate chickens lay eggs, I guarantee you people would be eating them and it wouldn’t be as weird as it is from our current perspective. If half the population is laying one egg a day—with most being unfertilized—what the fuck are we going to do with all these eggs?

The most efficient option is probably for the producer to eat the egg because that’s a ton of nutrients you just lost for no reason. But would you want to eat the same food every day? Probably not, even if it is mixed with other things. If you could sell it and buy food you actually wanted, that’s probably the better option.

If we assume this kind of laying daily laying is commonplace, certain human cultures probably would already have traditional meals using human eggs because again if half the people in your society are laying like a kilo of viable nutrients and you just let them go to waste, that’s not really evolutionarily advantageous. Though, I should note most likely humans wouldn’t lay eggs this frequently because I think that might be a result of domestication. Anyway it would be kind of interesting to have to have artifacts that are like made of human egg shells. People might keep fragments of their children’s hatching shells which would be kind of odd.

Also laying, even if infrequent, would be fucking annoying and I’d imagine birth control pills that just stop you from laying eggs would be very widely used. I can also imagine influencers marketing their eggs to fans a la gamer girl bath water which is not a thought I wanted to have today so thanks for that. Oh also people saying they can tell if someone is a virgin or a slut (the only two categories for these idiotic comparisons) by how their eggs look would probably be a thing because people are stupid like that already. Though hey Easter egg painting could be fun with huge eggs you can actually like paint on.

Anyway, to the people who mentioned this making more people uncomfortable eating other animals eggs, I disagree.

If laying eggs happens frequently and was a thing that had been happening for a while, I’d assume many people would not find it odd to eat the eggs, especially in the like autocannibalism way. And if it was commonplace to eat human eggs, people would probably be less averse to eating other animals eggs not more disgusted by it.

[–] Rokin@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago

Thank you again, Internet.

I'm sorry to give you just a single upvote.

[–] REgon@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago
[–] BodyBySisyphus@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago

I don't know why I clicked on this thread.
dead-dove-3

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago

I dunno, are the eggs any good?

[–] Pili@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I would eat my eggs, I'm not gonna waste all those nutrients.

[–] Cammy@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

If humans could lay eggs, I shudder to think about how capitalism would commodify those eggs.

[–] robotElder2@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago

Sounds like a great way to get a prion disease

[–] Abracadaniel@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

Depends on if it were taboo or not. But I'd probably try one. There'd be kink around it surely.

[–] makotech222@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

this reminds me of a very specific doujinshi... lmaooo volcel-police

[–] VOLCEL_POLICE@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.

نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.

volcel-police

[–] TheGenderWitch@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

hmmmmmmmmmmmm

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

no, but i would watch someone else eat it with much interest

[–] Omegamint@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago

There would be sections dedicated to this on porn websites, which would be disproportionately popular in conservative regions

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago

If humans laid eggs we would have evolved super different. Can't spread across the globe following herds around if you've gotta keep your eggs warm all the damn time.

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You can do this now, blood is a good substitute for eggs shrug-outta-hecks

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago
[–] crime@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

No, eggs are gross

[–] MineDayOff@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Yeah, it's more ethical plus the eggs must be big

I'm hive-brained and biomass pilled, if humans produced honey I'd eat that too.

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago
[–] HarryLime@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago
[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

All I know is my partner isn't willing

spoilerto use one of those ovipositor toys on me.

[–] oscardejarjayes@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

It probably wouldn't be very energy efficient, energy hierarchy and all. Just eat beans.

[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

Nej nej nej nej nej

[–] REgon@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

Probably not, since I don't drink human breast milk either.
::: spoiler Oh boy, ready for it to get weird?
I'd eat lab grown human meat though. Which is weird because I wouldn't eat meat from an amputated limb (that had to be amputated for some medical reason, but the meat would still, somehow, not be dangerous to consume) where the amputee consented to that happening.