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267

Reform voters ‘no understand why Nigel no live in big London house’ (newsthump.com)

submitted 4 months ago by Nero@sopuli.xyz to c/theonion@midwest.social

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“Me no get it,” explained Reform Voter Derek Williams, with a deeply furrowed brow and finger in his ear.

“Nigel won. Nigel get house. Nigel the big boss now?” they queried, with all the political sophistication the Reform party has come to rely on during the election campaign.

“Where Nigel? WHERE Nigel??”

When it was explained to Derek that Nigel won a single constituency, out of 650, and that Reform MPs can actually be counted on one hand, Derek looked ever more perplexed.

“Consti-chewsy? Nigel win election. Not Consti-chewsy! Nigel WIN! NIGEL STOP BOATS!”

At this point Derek began to get agitated, and it was decided it was best to calm him by returning him to his natural habitat inside a Wetherspoons with a copy of the Daily Mail in front of him.

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[–] worldwidewave@lemmy.world 74 points 4 months ago

If Reform voters could read, they’d be very upset

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Spot on!

Now we need an interview with a Tory voter who believes that those dangerous socialists just kicked Churchill out of Downing Street...

[–] ohwhatfollyisman@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

why is the thumbnail photo one of Dara O'Briain?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

It isn't though?

[–] EnderMB@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Isn't that the Megabus man without his hat?

[–] EnderMB@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

If you want to know what a Reform voter looks like, here's a good example

https://x.com/SalfordMe2023/status/1803714304476074137