"Mom, I'm not hungry!" "Honey, I can see you're hard. Just eat it."
Microblog Memes
A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.
Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.
Rules:
- Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
- Be nice.
- No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
- Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.
Related communities:
How do I delete someone else's comment?
๐๐คฃ
Yep, that's definitely porn.
Weird Al's Eat It is even weirder than I remember
Well, if they only got hard when we were actually hungry, and not just "bored hungry", I assume the market for crunchy snack foods wouldn't be as prominent.
Pfft as if we wouldn't have come out with a Viagra for teeth LMAO
Well, this is horrifying. Just the thought of old men before Tooth Viagra comes out just trying to eat chips with their knobbly wobbly teeth.
There would be no change because I am always hungry.
Blowjobs would be even more enjoyable and have less risk of harm
Wouldn't this mean every blowjob would have to be on a full stomach?
If they get hungry while going down, do the teeth inflate like a balloon or, click up like a switch blade?
Does ur dick click up like a switchblade???
Found the spitter...
Doesn't saliva production increase in anticipation of food? Kinda like...
My teeth retract into my gums until I get hungry.
Yours don't?
mine retract when i go to the swimming pool
Shrinkage, SHRINKAGE!!!
Only my fangs.
I can't decide if I love or hate this idea.
Let me help you with an additional rule: horny and hungry hardening shall be coupled and only occur together or not at all.
This calls for a pastrami sandwich.
"We're eating out for dinner tonight"
It could be kinda nice to run your tongue over your squishy, deflated teeth between meals.
And cleaning them might involve some sort of tooth sucker device to suck them clean between meals for all the hard to reach places.
I'm gonna go suck my wife's teeth and see what her reaction is
Milkshakes would be a larger percentage of fast food sales.
Mcdonald's would be out of business then.
Then I would be hard all the time in more ways than one.
hard to reach?
Hey it still counts.
If it's one to one how we get erect normally, and as the human body essentially inflates using blood, your teeth would ultimately be blood sponges. Seems impractical.
Of course, take it a step farther and maybe physiologically the blood hardens to a sharp point. I know some fantasy settings where bloodstone is a thing, so I guess that. If it was possible, it'd look sick as fuck.
Or maybe our teeth retract using that as a mechanism?
That is very relevant and hilarious ๐
I love Nigel and marmalade so much. I didn't think I'd like it at first, but it's my favorite shorts series