this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 99 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (4 children)

I am vacationing in Florida and a few days ago this guy swam up the drain and into the bowl.

There's no reason why a snake could not do that.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 44 points 3 months ago

Yeah but it's Florida, not a civilized place.

Cute toilet freg though.

[–] aspitzer@lemmy.world 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Pulptastic@midwest.social 2 points 3 months ago

Happy cake day!

[–] Voran@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Squee hes adorable

[–] BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

I have lived in Florida 90% of my life. I have never had a frog swim up the toilet pipe or even ever seen a frog in a toilet. How does that even happen?

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 82 points 3 months ago (2 children)

If you are worried about late marriage you can easily avoid it by going straight to cats and a manfree lifestyle.

[–] Jerkface@lemmy.world 38 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Cool, but to make room for the cats I had to flush all my snakes down the toilet. Am I doing this right?

[–] Flummoxed@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh shit, flush the snakes?? Not the husband??

[–] Jerkface@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I don't see the contradiction.

[–] Flummoxed@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

Lolololol, good point!!

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Worst thing for women's friendships is marriage. Stick with your fellow ladies. Live in a big house together and embrace the sorority lifestyle. Reject the Patriarchy, abandon legal monogamy, and embrace Amazonian thought.

[–] SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This sounds awesome. Can I become an honorary woman so I can get in on this? I come with a 100% little brother vibes guarantee.

[–] Shelena@feddit.nl 2 points 3 months ago

Yes, little brother vibes are good vibes. 👍

[–] zalgotext@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago

Please 🥺

[–] pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online 28 points 3 months ago (2 children)

What does 'late marriage' mean? Like getting married when you're older?

[–] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 66 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Doing it at like 8pm. By the time it's over and you're done with the reception it's too late to hop a plane and go on a honeymoon.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

OMG yeah, what a nightmare. I hate getting married after 8pm. It's so inconvenient.

[–] nifty@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

Why wouldn’t someone want to get married late? Like, they’re too old to have kids? If they wanted to kids wouldn’t they get married sooner? Or adopt any time? I think person is just talking about themselves.

[–] celeste@lemmy.world 27 points 3 months ago (2 children)

New bottom surgery just dropped!

[–] zammy95@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Anyone have any tips on how to un-read a comment?

[–] celeste@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

Come on I write way more unhinged shit >:3

[–] Flummoxed@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

This could save Americans millions in health care costs!!

[–] Norgur@fedia.io 23 points 3 months ago

Well, nickname checks out, I guess

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 14 points 3 months ago

Kid on my street got bit on the ass while peeing in the woods and died. Valid fear.

[–] paddirn@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Guy, had a similar fear all growing up too, except that I was afraid it’d bite my butthole (no idea why there, but whatever), not sure how I ever got over it.

[–] tacosplease@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Let me know if you ever remember how

[–] lugal@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Don't call your future partner "it"

[–] MindTraveller@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Unless you want a cool nonbinary objectkin partner

[–] lugal@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

Sure, to each their own

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago

Spiders swarming out of the toilet and killing me has been in the back of my mind ever since I saw Arachnophobia as a kid.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 8 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Only a hidden snake? What if they weren't hiding?

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's just Ralph the Toilet Snake.

He guards the knife.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

I have a toilet snake. You can buy those at any hardware store y'know.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

If the snake wasn't hiding and she saw it, then she was asking for it when she sat down.

[–] grasshopper_mouse@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] VaultBoyNewVegas@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I saw a horror movie as a kid where a guy was killed by something (snake, maybe) when sitting on the toilet. It made me very anxious when using a toilet for a long time. I think the movie was dreamcatcher based on the Stephen king book but I was only 6-7 when I saw that part so I could be completely wrong.

[–] seaweedsheep@literature.cafe 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You're remembering correctly. That's how the first character dies in Dreamcatcher. Stephen King was recovering from a car accident and was on oxy when he wrote the book if that helps explain anything.

[–] VaultBoyNewVegas@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

Thanks. With being so young when I saw the scene I wasn't sure if I just imagined parts of it.

[–] Flummoxed@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I blame Ghoulies especially because of the cover.

Honestly thought it was a Gremlins movie cover until now, but man if seeing that in the video store aisle didn't make me slam the lid on the toilet and run out and slam the bathroom door as fast as I could for several years...

[–] NauticalNoodle@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

This movie scene had me double checking the toilet before sitting down for at least a decade.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

I'd rather the snake.

[–] ech@lemm.ee 3 points 3 months ago

Easy, just don't be holding the bad-luck teddy bear while your friends are scamming a magic bank out of some magic batteries.