Why isn't Elon swooping in, offering to build a carbon tunnel to the Titanic ("funding secured") and calling people pedos along the way? Seems like exactly his cup of tea.
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I think his days of pretending to be a good guy are over.
So he can just skip the helping part, just start calling people pedos
He’s busy waging a war on trans
There’s a great punchline about boys hidden somewhere in there.
He has done it once and cannot be bothered to do the same things over and over again. Rescuing people is a solved problem after all and there is no more challenge in it.
NEXT: Hideo Kojima makes a VR Game that realistically simulates what would be to rescue the Titan, however no player managed to succeed yet, as their submersible also gets stuck in the middle of deep sea, thus also prompting a rescue operation.
One of the most bizarre non-the-onion headlines I have read in a while.
It really is
But the real question is: is it steered by a Steam Controller?
"Great, now that we're close, use the touch pad to extend the robot arm"
They are doomed.
Steam Deck. Linux. They will need to Bing the correct magic for GRUB_CMDLINE_LINUX_DEFAULT, /etc/default/grub, in order to get rid of spurious interrupts.
Too bad the Titanic is below 3000 Meters, we know he won't pass 3
If only they had sunk to 2999 meters 2: episode 2
I wonder what controller his sub uses
Hey the steam controller was kind of a flop but I got one when they went on closeout at like $5 and it's actually pretty sweet. Very niche but definitely unique.
They're making a new one and calling it the "Steam Quarter-Deck"
Is it time again to start praying to Lord Gaben?
Are you ready for a miracle?
Had no clue Gaben ran anything besides steam, especially not a company like Inkfish. Pretty cool.
Please tell me this site is a joke
This site is not a joke, and nor is the headline.
So, /c/nottheonion? We really need that
You ain't kidding, that sub his GabeNs https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSV_Limiting_Factor
What happened to James Cameron's stuff?
Deepsea Challenger isn't operational. It's a decade old and in a museum right now.
It belongs in a museum!
Perhaps he still could ask those Na'vi to lend some help, you know?
James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does for James Cameron. James Cameron does what James Cameron does because James Cameron is James Cameron.
~James Cameron
Gaben pls
This thing would be useless in the search effort
Honestly, this is a headline I would never have expected in 2023.
People, just trust me, Gabe Newell: it's actually really safe! It's controlled by a Steam Deck hot wired into a version of Source that runs Half-Life 2 and Vampire The Masquerade: Bloodlines at the same time it controls the sub. Just don't pick Malkavian on the selection screen, otherwise the lights might flicker, and the sub might malfunction, leaving you stuck deep at sea.
...huh? Even DSV Alvin is still active. I'm sure there are more.
It's true that after the overhaul about 10 years ago Alvin can dive to nearly twice the Titanic's depth, but Alvin and Atlantis are in the Pacific Ocean right now
Just don't expect him to make a 3rd submarine guys
And it's also named after GOU Limiting Factor from Iain M. Banks The Culture series!