Edited to add credits that were cropped out. - WO
this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
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Until you really really need to go hard, then it's clothes off again.
A few years back I had something clogging up my intestines (no clue what) on the night that I was going to take a 3 hour flight to a wedding, so no lying down and way too much sitting in a cramped position for a too long time. I never felt more constipated as after I arrived and could finally stretch again.
So about 2 hours later when I could feel that it was nearly time, I evacuated to the furthest possible bathroom (I didn't want to be a party pooper), lost all clothing except my socks and spend 30 minutes in agony, explosively shitting away, while covered in sweat and bracing myself against the walls.
All of which to say, is that you might think that you have left your shirtless days behind, but when shit really hits the fan, then you won't be able to stop yourself from going back to your old habits.
I mean I've already shit my pants once this year... It's gotten better after curbing the drinking but once you hit near 40s farts are almost universally untrustworthy.
E: Not to say every fart is a shart. But every time I've shit my pants the fart felt safe lol.