this post was submitted on 19 Dec 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

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[–] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 119 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Yes but that was irrelevant because she never cooked for me, she was just hot. Still is, in fact.

We always joke that he has a Wine Mom. He thinks that we're calling her a drunk. It means that she gets better with age.

[–] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

Relevant username if I ever saw one

[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Man I was tormented with that crap as a kid. “HOLY CRAP YOUR SISTER IS HOT!!! That’s your mommmmmm? Whoa!”

Same crap with my sister.

I see them both as living farts.

[–] MadBob@feddit.nl 5 points 1 week ago

I had a running joke with this lad in school where he'd say "your sister's fit" and I'd punch him in the arm. No idea why we did it or how it stayed so friendly. Just remembered it for the first time in maybe 20 years. Thanks!

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Well now we need to see pictures of your hot mom and hot sis so we can judge for ourselves in the name of science and research.

[–] Cheems@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Commenting to come back to see that guys mom

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

The good news is if your mother and sister are attractive, There's decent odds your good looking as well. Unless your mother fucked an ogre, and if that's so... Well at least Shrek's your dad?

[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I’m not ugly, but I’m the least attractive member of my family.

My brother looked like a Greek god, my sister looked like a model. My dad was so sought after that his name was spray painted all over our town with hearts and love confessions. Bridges, buildings, love for him was everywhere. He was chased by women aged 18-90.

I was born with crossed eyes and had to have a corrective surgery. Every man in my family is over 6ft tall and I’m only 5’7. I still randomly message my mother to thank her for going through with the surgery.

I definitely lost the lottery, but it could have been worse.

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Well incase no one has told you that you are attractive lately, you're fucking beautiful man. May every road rise up to meet you

[–] theangryseal@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Well thank you. :p You’re beautiful too!