Lumelore

joined 1 year ago
[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 10 hours ago

Yeah, I used to puppeteer a guy around so more people would like me as well, but I eventually accepted that some people are not going to like me no matter what. It's really important to be kind to yourself. Be who you want to be, not who others expect you to be ♥️

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 21 hours ago (2 children)

I used to have the same issue as well with being envious of how cute other people are and being socially anxious. I'm only 2 years old than you, and I've mostly gotten over it and I'm sure you will as well with time.

I think what helps a lot here is working on your self confidence and self love. Chances are, you're also really cute and awesome just like those people you mentioned above.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 26 points 1 day ago (1 children)

They aren't supposed to be but if you have enough money anything can be patentable, copyrightable, or trademarkable.

This is literally me...

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 3 days ago

I prefer this announcement instead. I like Nintendo games but hate the company for taking down emulators and sueing indie devs for a really dumb reason.

lol (image)

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 3 days ago

Please persist. I know it's hard but those fuckers want us dead. Don't give them what they want. Our existence is resistance.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

They finally have multiline app names in beta for the pixel... Idk why it's taking them so long. My old crusty motorola displays long names just fine; its crazy that it took until Android 15 just to get a beta of that.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 1 week ago (5 children)

What if someone is all of those things simultaneously

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 week ago

I went to a rural highschool and in 2016 Shrek won our mock election. I don't remember who got second or third though.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 23 points 1 week ago

There's an in development technology called in vitro gametogenesis (IVG) that would allow same sex couples as well as infertile people to have biological children. It's been in the works for over a decade and as far as I am aware has not yet been tested on humans.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 week ago

I know but nala must do something behind the scenes that discover doesn't because nala works way better than discover does, at least in my experience.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 2 weeks ago

ngl I thought your profile pic was the Mona Lisa but now that I see a bigger image of it it's definitely not lol

 

[Image Transcription]: Snoopy wearing a wizard hat making potions. Top text says "HOW TITTY SKITTLES IS MADE." Bottom text says "BOTTOM TEXT." In smaller font beneath bottom text it says in parentheses "i'm a bottom colon three."

 

So I'm wondering if I might have klinefelter's (XXY chromosomes) or if I'm just very receptive to estrogen because the effects of HRT happened to me way faster than I've heard other people say it happened to them.

I've seen charts like these and I am a bit dubious of them because my timeline doesn't match up at all.

image of chart

I don't know if my experience is actually normal or not, but when I started estrogen about a little over a year ago, it only took a few days for me to notice my skin being softer, and then literally the next day I woke up with breast buds and about 2 to 3 weeks later I had noticeable breasts that were big enough that it was difficult for me to boymode at work. I'm pretty sure I got to Tanner stage 3 in like half the time that's expected.

From what I've heard from others is that they didn't get breast buds until at least 3 months in and that made me question why mine happened so quickly.

I've also always been pathetically weak and it's also always been difficult for me to gain muscle. Which makes me think I had low testosterone even before I started spiro. I remember when I had my 3 month follow up, my t was at 89 ng/dL and I remember my doctor commenting that that was lower than he expected, although I have zero idea if that is actually lower than normal for 3 months on 100mg spiro.

I'm curious if any of you also experienced a similar timeline to me, or if your timeline fits the charts that I've seen. I know my timeline is quite fast and that it might be hard to believe (idk if my experience is normal or not), but I swear it is my genuine experience with HRT.

 

As of a few days ago, I am now 1 year on HRT! I typically don't like posting pictures of myself, but I also wanted to make a transition timeline and share my progress, so here it is lol.

transition-timeline-image

Estrogen is amazing. I finally feel like my body is mine and something that I need and want to take care of. Sometimes, I randomly think about my gender and being a woman and it makes me so happy, but overall I don't really think about my gender as frequently as I used to years ago.

I also started progesterone last month and luckily I am one of the people that respond well to it. My overall mood has significantly improved since I started it, and it also helps me sleep a lot better. I am now waking up early in the morning feeling energized which is something I have not experienced in a very long time lol.

I've also been working on my voice as well. I did make a post here about 6 months ago where I asked for feedback on my voice (which was really breathy and did not sound good). I think I have improved quite a bit since then. I'd really appreciate your feedback on it if you would like to critique it.

My voice training progress (youtube link)

 

First one was in a marching band, second one was in an IKEA float.

 

 

This is easiest done by sorting by Top of 1 hour, so there are only a few posts to scroll past.

When you get all the way to the bottom where there are no more posts to load, try scrolling down.

While you do that, any NSFW image that currently has a blur over it will have the blur squished vertically towards the center, allowing you to see the top and bottom of the image unblurred.

 

I am using kubuntu and recently my .desktop files no longer launch from my desktop. If I go to ~/desktop in dolphin I can double click the same files and they launch just fine from there.

When I do try to launch from desktop it just shows a blank file icon very briefly.

Only new thing I've done since they stopped working is install virt-manager and QEMU to set up a Windows vm.

I also tried creating a new user and the problem still persisted, which means it is not anything in my home directory.

I've tried googling but haven't found anyone with the same problem as me.

 

I'm currently studying CS and I'll get my bachelor's degree next year. I've been searching for remote SWE internships for months now and have not had any luck. I even made a project to put on my resume and it's still just rejection email after rejection email. Maybe I need more projects? What tips do you have for getting an Internship?

I really don't want to go back to my previous job cause working with old people in rural America as a minority is literally hell. I think I might just go into omega debt instead lol.

77
Memories (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

Was looking through an old hard drive today and I found some old pictures of me from before I transitioned. I only have a few of them because I didn't like taking pictures of myself back then (hmm, I wonder why? /s). I thought about deleting them because I don't like how I looked back then, but in a weird way they also made me happy. I think it is because they serve as a reminder as to how far I have come in the four years since I realized that I am trans. Comparing them with current pictures of myself, it is very obvious that I am much happier now.

I also found some old picrews that I made of myself shorty after I realized that I am trans. These made me really happy for multiple reasons. One is that they brought back a lot of memories. The other is helped me figure something out. I've been trying to figure out exactly when I had the realization and the best I had beforehand was sometime in late 2019, but those pictures are dated October 28th which makes them the earliest evidence of me being trans that I have. I made like thirty of them but here are two of them that I like.

Past me would be so happy to know that I actually look like this now:

This is an image that I think I used to come out to a few people. It's hard to see, but I decided to add some estradiol to my mouth:

Anyways, I just felt like sharing. I'm curious if anyone else also used picrew at first to explore their gender. Also if you have any transition related stories you feel like sharing, I'd love to read those too.

134
egg_irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/egg_irl@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

I'm not an egg anymore, but I found this meme I made several years ago when looking through an old hard drive and wanted to put it on Lemmy.

Image description: Top text says "Me: 100% totally cis male." Bottom text says "Also me: A girl with girl stuff and girl hair and girl clothes." The bottom part is actually an image of a Minecraft skin that is posted on Planet Minecraft.

 

 

So for the past few months, usually near the beginning of the month, I will have a few days where I am super depressed and emotional. Today is one of those days. It started off with me waking up crying at 2 am for no reason and I was literally sobbing for 2 hours before I was able to fall back asleep. Then I waking up, I felt super depressed. I have not felt this much depression since I started taking an anti-depresant 5 years ago. I hardly ate anything today and I pretty much just layed around. I tried working out for an hour, and even that couldn't make me happy. I am assuming that this is going to happen again next month, and idk what to do cause it is super debilitating. Asides from these few days, I am very happy otherwise. I have been on hrt for 5 months now, I'm hoping maybe prog will help with it once I'm able to get it. I don't know how to manage it until then since my usual coping mechanism isn't working and I also don't know if prog will even solve it in the first place.

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