this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2023
155 points (98.7% liked)

Asklemmy

43833 readers
812 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy πŸ”

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)

In water, Hippopotamus. On land, Rhinoceros.

[–] bernieecclestoned@sh.itjust.works 54 points 1 year ago (4 children)
[–] jbloggs777@discuss.tchncs.de 86 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A whale, or possibly a bowl of petunias

[–] NotSpez@lemm.ee 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wish I could understand what went though the bowl of petunias’ mind when it thought β€˜not again’ though…

[–] GreenPlasticSushiGrass@kbin.social 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I just read about this! The bowl of petunias was an incarnation of Agrajag. "Not again" referred to being killed by Arthur. Again.

[–] NotSpez@lemm.ee 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] AFLYINTOASTER@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What the fuck is this thread

[–] spauldo@lemmy.ml 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

They're referring to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Specifically, they're talking about a creature (the bowl of petunias created high above the surface of an airless world as a byproduct of a star drive powered by improbability) who has reincarnated many, many times, but in every life is killed by an otherwise inoffensive and constantly bewildered British man.

[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Depends who hits the ground second.

[–] Pringles@lemm.ee 40 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hippos are crazy territorial, so my money would be on them. It's hard to imagine a rhino losing the battle, but the pure unfiltered rage of a hippopotamus when you trespass his territory will frighten even the boldest of rhinos.

[–] roguetrick@kbin.social 29 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Rhinos are territorial enough to try to fight elephants. They lose, but they try.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 40 points 1 year ago (4 children)

My money is on hippo every day of the week. You'd have to find a freak specimen of a rhino to compete with even an average hippo.

Rhino weight range: 1,320 - 2,090 pounds

Hippo weight range: 2,900 - 4,000 pounds

[–] Windex007@lemmy.world 28 points 1 year ago

Maybe I'm missing something, but I'm seeing in my googling that MOST rhino species are more massive than hippos.

[–] DogMuffins@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 1 year ago

It varies depending on rhino species but rhinos are generally larger.

Largest land mammals are elephant > rhino > hippo.

White rhinos are often over 3,500kg.

[–] tpyo@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Huh. I guess I thought rhinos were bigger. Well I bet one could take on a pygmy hippo!

weigh 180–275 kg (397–606 lb)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] blanketswithsmallpox@kbin.social 24 points 1 year ago (3 children)
[–] balderdash9@lemmy.zip 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yes, actually. He seemed to think it wasn't so clear cut, but everyone here has their money on the hippo

[–] 0_0j@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

WOAA.. elephants are way smarter than i thought!, pulled one up on rhino, without a sweat!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] AWittyUsername@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros

[–] Deez@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

I’m not a large water dwelling mammal, where did you get that preposterous hypothesis?

[–] DogMuffins@discuss.tchncs.de 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm surprised everyone is betting on hippos.

Rhinos are bigger (generally), heavier, move faster, have collagen armor, and have a horn.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hippos are more angry if you fuck with em.

Try getting angry at 3,500kg of pointy faced Rhino moving at 50kmh and see how much that helps.

[–] ExLisper@linux.community 14 points 1 year ago

Depends on who's Kung Fu is stronger.

[–] BearJCC@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Rhino's have low intelligence, can't swim (well), hace poor eyesight, and are smaller. My money's on the Hippo.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] sirico 12 points 1 year ago

Mr Rodgers in a blood stained sweater

[–] u202307011927@feddit.de 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] redballooon@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Oh ok that’s settled then.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] roguetrick@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago

It would likely be counterproductive to try to bite a charging rhino.

[–] YoFrodo@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Does the rhino get prep time?

[–] FlashZordon@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wanted them to do this face off on the short lived Animal Face-Off on Animal Planet!

[–] kmkz_ninja@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Was that the show with the green wireframe CGI animals that they would show duking it out and eating wireframe people?

[–] FlashZordon@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Hell yeah it was awesome to middle school me.

[–] atlasraven31@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It depends who is hungrier.

[–] HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've been led to believe it is hippos who are hungry

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago (3 children)

So where are these hungry hungry hippos?

[–] spauldo@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Looking for food, probably.

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] atlasraven31@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

The most dangerous game.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] cram42@kbin.social 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Those ravenous ravenous rhinos.

I think the rhino would be able to get a nice stab wound in once maybe twice, but after that the sheer power of the hippos bite with destroy the rhino as theyre close.

[–] vinceman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

These things are tiny they wouldn't stand a chance against a rhino https://youtu.be/NBfi8OEz0rA?si=MuLBF1TxDarmbCsD

[–] UnicodeHamSic@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I feel like thr hippo just has a higher ring IQ. Like, rhino has got the nose but I think the hippo would just controll the pace of the fight so that it couldn't come into play

[–] roguetrick@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago

They don't, there's videos of them squaring off. The hippo opens its mouth and the rhino just sticks its horn in. I imagine neither is happy about the situation, as I wouldn't want to stick my nose in a hippo's mouth myself.

[–] Jedi@bolha.forum 2 points 1 year ago
load more comments
view more: next β€Ί