this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 3 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

This is great

People here get way to up in arms when Trump is mentioned. Just enjoy the stupidity of the world.

[–] kyle@lemm.ee 5 points 6 hours ago

LBJ had a special button installed that would summon someone to bring him a Fresca.

[–] SplashJackson@lemmy.ca 1 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Fucking bootlicking piece of ass

[–] SuperNovaStar@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 4 hours ago

As much as I want to call out bootlickers, it would honestly be weirder if they didn't continue the tradition.

Headline might as well be "Trump first president to prefer Diet Coke."

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 47 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

You know every time he does something, someone in the comments makes an idiocracy reference and we all roll our eyes because "Yeah, theres the low hanging fruit guy coming to farm votes" like its an original thought.

Well... Its my turn.

"This Inauguration brought to you by Diet coke. DIET COKE, IF YOU DONT DRINK IT FUCK YOU!"

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 7 points 15 hours ago

Except Idiocracy didn’t go far enough. Drumph isn’t going to walk around saying he’s sponsored by Coca-Cola, Coca-Cola is going to go around saying they’re sponsored by him.

“The Coca-Cola Company, sponsored by Donald Trump. Donald Trump - Fuck you!”

[–] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 77 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

In other words: Coca-cola doesn't have a million to burn like the other oligarchs but wants to make Donny Two-Scoops feel like their special boy.

[–] MimicJar@lemmy.world 63 points 18 hours ago

In other words, Coca-Cola realized that they don't need to spend $1 million dollars, they can just slap "Special Boy" on a bottle for 6 cents and achieve the same result.

[–] PrettyFlyForAFatGuy 22 points 17 hours ago

You don't think the coca cola company has a million to burn?

THE COCA COLA COMPANY?!!

They just know that donny will lap this tat up and ask for seconds

[–] QubaXR@lemmy.world 31 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Did Coke just call him fat?

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 1 points 4 hours ago

It was diet Coke

It is basically health food

[–] BoobaAwooga@lemmynsfw.com 18 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Nah according to people from last time he was president he drinks this shit a LOT

[–] undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch 19 points 18 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 11 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

Holy shit it's not a joke.

Also:

James Corden has said that Joe Biden has an "ice cream button" on his desk.

Quickly, Ben & Jerry's, you still got a few days left!

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 1 points 4 hours ago

I like this timeline

[–] arandomthought@sh.itjust.works 13 points 19 hours ago

I saw the community this was posted in and my brain somehow removed the "not" in "not the Onion". I was like "haha, oh the Onion. They still got it."

Then I looked at the community again...

[–] IDKWhatUsernametoPutHereLolol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Can coca cola please gift him more non-diet cokes so he can get diabeetus and die

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 0 points 4 hours ago

That's kind of a terrible thing to say. I wouldn't wish death or diabetes on anyone.

With that being said, Coke and Pepsi are slowly killing America

[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 4 points 18 hours ago

Or just Diet Coke laced with polonium.

[–] Soulifix@kbin.melroy.org 8 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Want to know something funny?

Coke won't allow anyone to put Jesus on Coke, but they'll happily put Trump on it.

[–] nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz 11 points 19 hours ago

Trump's probably a much better customer than Jesus.

[–] NoneOfUrBusiness@fedia.io 1 points 16 hours ago

I might not understand how Christianity does these things, but wouldn't putting Jesus on coke be sacrilegious as fuck?