this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2024
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[–] GreenPlasticSushiGrass@moist.catsweat.com 138 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I hate that moment when your lungs shut down at night.

[–] umbrella@lemmy.ml 63 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] dukatos@lemm.ee 32 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee 1 points 2 weeks ago

And my sword!

[–] dukatos@lemm.ee 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] DaGeek247@fedia.io 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There's two kinds. In one you snore. In the other your body just forgets to breathe.

Get checked for sleep apnea.

[–] Dr_Box@lemmy.world 45 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I've mastered the art of going to the bathroom to piss without fully waking myself up

[–] cavveman@lemmynsfw.com 50 points 2 weeks ago

Bedwetting?

[–] devfuuu@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] nieceandtows@programming.dev 15 points 2 weeks ago

Hopefully not literally

[–] janonymous@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago
[–] we_avoid_temptation@lemmy.zip 1 points 2 weeks ago

I don't wake up at all. 2/10, would not recommend. 3/10 with rice

[–] turkalino@lemmy.yachts 9 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Keep your eyes open only enough to not bump into stuff. Close when not needed

[–] HKPiax@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

He calls his bed “bathroom” and just pisses himself

[–] Chadus_Maximus@lemm.ee 3 points 2 weeks ago

Use a bottle (don't do this).

[–] LordKitsuna@lemmy.world 34 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The solution is to stop drinking any liquids like 4 hours before bed and pee right before bed. That way you can just become dehydrated overnight which means that when you wake up you will want water desperately which will help you get your ass out of bed too

[–] Chadus_Maximus@lemm.ee 15 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Liquids aren't even the issue. Salt is. Every time I gorge myself on some smoked salmon before bedtime I inevitably wake up in the middle of the night. Apparently getting rid of some salt is somehow now important than a good night's sleep. My bladder isn't going to corrode just because I have slightly more salt in it. Let me fucking sleep!

[–] volvoxvsmarla@lemm.ee 2 points 2 weeks ago

Your entire nervous and vascular system reading this be like am I a joke to you

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Condom catheters, my dude. It's a catheter you don't have to insert. Just gotta get used to pissing the bed again.

[–] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 27 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

My bed shares a wall with the toilet. I’ve been debating routing the plumbing in to the closet and installing a urinal.

[–] RogueBanana@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Urinal in the toilet or bedroom? In case you wanna Min Max it

[–] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 7 points 2 weeks ago

The toilet and shower are opposite my closet wall. I’d really only need a drain and a bottle of water to wash it down. I’d turn half my closet in to a washroom I guess.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Does it share a wall with the tub? Just put a little piss slot in the wall. Cheaper.

[–] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No tub, but the shower yes. I could just run the pipe through the wall to the toilet tank… save money refilling that thing too!

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Pipe? What pipe? I said piss slot I meant piss slot

[–] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Piss pipe, bro. Get on board!

That sounds like something I should hook up next to my bum hose.

Use the window

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah but that doesn't fix the problem of having to out of bed. Once I do that, there's no going back to sleep. I'm up for the rest of the day, too tired to accomplish anything.

[–] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 weeks ago

It saves me from having to walk all the way around and bang my knee on the coffee table or whatever

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Catheter required less plumbing and is only moderately more gross

[–] SmallBorg@lemm.ee 15 points 2 weeks ago

That's me every single night

[–] Num10ck@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

stop having liquids 3 hours before bedtime.

[–] cyrano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
[–] Pantsofmagic@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You can't tell me what to do!

[–] WR5@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

You should be fine as long as you wear those magical pants to sleep in as well.

[–] slackassassin@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 weeks ago

Pssshh, then how would I drink myself to sleep.

[–] Jake_Farm@sopuli.xyz 5 points 2 weeks ago

What if Im thirsty?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

After I wake up and take my nightly midnight turd sesh (all y'all lucky piss losers) I drink about as much water as I pissed away. What's the point of having a fancy water bottle if you don't use it and keep it full of ice water 24/7

[–] Pacmanlives@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

It’s called a catheter! Does not everyone use one every night!?!??!? /s

[–] stinky@redlemmy.com 1 points 1 week ago

Body: you're so thirsty. dehydrated. tongue sticking to your mouth, so thiiiiirsty. go pee eight times before falling asleep and evacuate every fluid ounce of fucking water in your body for no reason thiiiiiiirsty

[–] funtrek@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 2 weeks ago

Those bottles from the hospital work fine. You just turn to the side and that’s it. No need to go to the bathroom.