this post was submitted on 28 May 2024
38 points (81.7% liked)

Jokes

3556 readers
62 users here now

Lemmy users' attempts at being funny

Welcome to the funniest community on Lemmy! The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules

1- Bigotry, sexualization of minors, and hate speech are not allowed.

2- Links of any kind are not allowed in posts. All NSFW or NSFL content must have a proper Content Warning.

3- Remember to treat your fellow users with kindness and respect. Repeated violations will result in a ban.

4- Any attempts at advertising, company/personal promotion, and spamming will result in a ban.

Sister Communities

Comedy Heaven

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Mental Health

To partner with our community and be included here, you are free to message me or comment on our pinned post.

Community Moderation

For inquiry on becoming a moderator of this community, you may comment on the pinned post of the time.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

A woman is out shopping, and suddenly spots her husband. As she's about to say hello to him, she notices the man is filthy: his clothes have stains from spilt food and drinks, his face and hands are dark with mud and grime.

"What happened to you?!" she asks, skipping the hello.

"Oh, it's nothing, don't worry about it..."

"What do you mean don't worry about it? You're dirty like a pig! At least go home and shower!!"

"No, I can't... There's something I have to do. Sorry, honey, I'll see you later tonight."

"Well at least tell me how you got so muddy!"

"I really can't tell you. It's nothing, I promise."

The woman starts getting angry. "Listen to me. Either you tell me what's going on, or go home with me right now to wash yourself!! If not, I'm packing your things and kicking you out!"

The husband thinks about it for a while, then makes a deep sigh and says: "Alright... I'll come clean."

top 8 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] JudahBenHur@lemm.ee 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] JudahBenHur@lemm.ee 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

its pretty good! if anything maybe shorten it up a little?

[–] NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Maybe! There's kind of a genre of jokes where the setup is quite long but the punchline is just a bad pun. The most extreme example is Nate the Snake. I was kind of going for that feeling, but didn't go overboard.

I'd be interested to see how you think it could be made shorter. Gotta get the key points across - husband refuses to shower and also refuses to explain what's happening.

[–] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It reminds me of a Norm MacDonald joke.

[–] Fetus@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

Well, the light was on...

[–] hash0772@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 months ago

That was an interesting read.

[–] Sunny@slrpnk.net 2 points 5 months ago

I liked this one! 🙌