this post was submitted on 25 Apr 2024
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[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 32 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Some men are so desparate for love from their male friends but can't handle the idea of showing any form of sincerity towards another man.

Instead of calling it love between male friends, respect becomes a currency for love and takes on some pretty toxic and abusive traits. Name calling, belittlement, insults, questionably aggressive forms of physical touch and more just to avoid giving a compliment or a hug.

That underlying love never gets expressed in a healthy way and you get the strange, hypocritical and mind breakingly confusing behaviour. Why do they hate everything about me but want me to go out for drinks after work tonight?

I think all this unaddressed love disguised as respect is more gay than the time I walked into the bathroom at a gay club and saw two guys giving another guy a blowjob.

Go give your buddy a hug, it ain't as gay as the 50th dick joke of the day that you have to say. Hell, it's not even lunch time yet, my dude.

[–] MotoAsh@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

Seriously blows my mind how toxic some guys get with it. I just treat it like an extension of them. If that's how they treat people they like, I take it as a sign they're a piece of shit who'll really mistreat someone they don't like. That makes them a bad person in my book, regardless of how twisted or self-imposed it is.

[–] NimbleSloth@lemmy.world 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I've known a lot of my friends for a long time, 20+ years. We hug each other every time we see each other. We also rib one another. Don't be afraid to show your friends love. Hug your bros, life is too short.

[–] Shou@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago

I don't hug men who don't hug their friends. I don't trust the equating a platonic hug with someone's sexuality. That said. All my male friends are comfortable hugging each other and always seem to have been.

[–] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 7 points 6 months ago

Yes, is the unfortunate answer to that question

[–] Chakravanti@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 months ago

Six one way half a dozen the other.

[–] agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 0 points 6 months ago

Men are, historically, "tougher". This is traditionally facilitated by teasing one another so we become less sensitive to criticism.

[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world -4 points 6 months ago

basically the same thing, sorry