this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2024
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Kids are like the least exotic pet out there.
I could save up and buy a savannah cat every decade. But there's only one person who's ever going to be my kid. You know what I think when I look at my kid?
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
That's an exotic pet. Fuck a leopard.
Maybe if you hadn't fucked a leopard your kid wouldn't have been so weird.
Anyone who would fuck a leopard seems likely to have a weird kid no matter who/what they have it with.
When it comes to pets, exotic refers to uncommon. Kids are the most common of pets.
In a lot of US cities, I think dogs have surpassed kids as the more common pet.
Seems to be the case here in Seattle and I very much approve. I'm one of those people, in fact. My dogs are so much quieter and easier to train than children are.
Easier to train than adult dog owners, too! A truly impressive amount of Seattle dog owners think "no dogs allowed on the play field" means "designated off-leash dog park".