Gaming

I have OCD. For Skyrim, I mapped out 10 playthroughs, one for each race, with a definite goal for each. This led me to make spreadsheets and documents explaining everything about the build, the quests to do, what items or spells to get, what order to do things in, etc. Skyrim has I think like 89 followers, and I assigned “allowed,” and “not allowed,” for each one, for each playthrough (there are no high-elf followers in Skyrim).

This took me two months of testing the builds viabilities, reworking, and intense, constant research. Fast forward a year later, I have not played through any of the builds, and the project isnt even on the backburner.

I did something similar with Doom. I made a spreadsheet of every level of every id/Doom Engine/Build Engine game. Every. Single. One. I wanted to beat them all in release order, and play and beat a lot of the mods out there. I beat Doom 1 and 2, played for a few hours with several of the hundreds of mods I downloaded, and again, its been a long time, and it is so far in the back of my mind, I havent done it yet.

As for Skyrim, it did give me a cool idea for a mod where you don’t get choices, and the game isnt a sandbox, but a linear RPG, like Fable. It would make the game way better if you played as a character doing predetermined stuff. I hate being a warrior to get mages robes which is the main problem of Skyrim. Imagine playing throughout the Skyrim Civil War as all 10 races from 10 unique perspectives.

I guess what I’m trying to point out is that even when I want to just have fun, even when there is no reward for doing so, I optimize and research all the fun out of games, barely playing them. I just bought Scrap Mechanic and have probably watched more footage since buying than played it. I used to sink hours into a game, now it can’t hold my attention for more than an hour, or if it does, it becomes a total obsession. Mental illness is a trip lol.