this post was submitted on 12 Nov 2023
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[–] Fedegenerate@lemmynsfw.com 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I believe I'm the latter in this unauthorized and unofficial poll.

I'm a lot more attached to my sexuality than my gender. I am definitely attracted to women. I am a man because it's more convenient for me to be a man however. I have thought about whether I'm NB due to my indifference, but then I rethink my thoughts and notice

I am a man [...]

and just decide to stop there, I don't have to care about the "because". I'm a keep it simple stupid kinda person.

[–] Drivebyhaiku@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's valid. Being non-binary trans being treated as my birth sex causes me all kinds of underlying social anxiety and makes me hate being around people the same way I hate looking in mirrors. I assume the inconvenience of having to educate people on my specific needs because the burden of doing so is more often lesser than the discomfort of not doing so.

If I don't bother to correct someone's assumptions in a social setting it's usually because either I expect to deal with the person only very rarely and I do not give much weight at all to how they think of me... But the interaction does still remind me of everything I don't like about my experience and makes me self conscious in a harmful way.

If it were something based out of a lack of feeling rather than a surfit it would probably be a fairly innert part of the way I express myself.

[–] Fedegenerate@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

If it were something based out of a lack of feeling rather than a surfit it would probably be a fairly innert part of the way I express myself.

I obviously don't know what it would have been like if I were born female, maybe I would still be a man. As of right now though, I wear men's clothes because I always have, wear a man's hairstyle because I have always have, use he/him because I always have... It feels more like inertia than a part of me, along with just being easier to conform to something I don't particularly care about, so if the ball had started off rolling the otherway... I dunno though. I suppose another explaination is that I'm just really secure in my "manness" I don't feel any need to convince myself that I am man, I just am one. Probably why I don't care about the "because" I just don't need it.

My answer to the initial question would depend on how much it upended my life I suspect. If I woke up, I was a woman and everyone remembered me as always being a woman, my wardrobe filled with skirts and I could slot right in, I think I'd just keep on trucking after some initial shock. But, if I had to explain that "I'm a woman now", buy new clothes, and all that nonsense, I think my answer would more closely resemble the parent comment.