this post was submitted on 27 Dec 2024
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Are there hobbygroups in your area? Keep the focus on the shared hobby and get to meet people through said mutual interest, don't focus on being there to make friends. Since the former leads to better relationships.
Only some gym, and 2-3 restaurants. It's a small town in middle of Europe. I have to drive about 100km to university by train every weekend because I study part-time.
But you are going to university. That is a HUGE opportunity to make connections. See if there are any clubs or activities you could be a part of. Try to give some things a try, even if you're only sort of sure whether you will like it. Make small talk with your peers! It doesn't take much to get friendships going when you have regular proximity to people and find some that share your interests.
Yes sometimes I try to talk with someone, sometimes it's enforced by teachers when do we have to finish group work. Meeting people in university is ok but I still feel like my age is a hindrance. I'm 27yo when my groupmates are all in their early 20s. I feel old to them, especially when it comes to women. I have a few people I talk to when I'm at university, but still, I only talk to them at university.
Well, that's a good starting point. The age thing probably isn't as big a deal as you think, but there are probably other people close to your age studying there too, it might just be a little harder to find them.
I guess all I can say is keep putting yourself out there, and don't focus too hard on anything more serious than friendships while you're feeling lonely. Be kind to yourself and I think the rest will follow
I was in a similar situation during my first round of grad school. In retrospect, there was no need for me to feel self-conscious. A lot of guys are still pretty immature in their early 20s. By comparison, a guy in their late 20s can be mature and reliable.
I found university quite social, but that varies from campus to campus. That said, after your part time classes, hang back at the university and see if there are any social goings-on. You'll get more bang for your 100km trip.
If you're able to, anyway.
Can't offer much on small town stuff, that's outside my experience
Same, but I don't even study and my temporary place of work is full of people I don't like. So I understand how fucked that situation is.
Yeah I also don't like people at my work. I work as forklift operator and there people are mostly older than me and they live only this work. Their laught on me cause I study and I'm "smart". I didn't even talk much, I'm quiet, so I don't know why they think I'm smug