this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2024
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Ask Me Anything

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Ask Me Anything (AMA) Community Rules and Guidelines

This is the lemmy.ca AmA.

Welcome to the Ask Me Anything (AMA) community! This is a space where individuals from various backgrounds come together to engage in open and informative discussions. To ensure a respectful, enjoyable, and inclusive experience for everyone involved, we have established the following rules and guidelines:

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-Use NSFW and trigger warning TW in brackets if you talk about sensitive subject.

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Remember, these rules and guidelines are in place to ensure a positive and informative environment for all participants. Failure to comply may result in 3 strikes warnings, temporary restrictions, or permanent bans at the discretion of the moderators.

in the future, a mod check and balance system might be implemented . Subject to change : [You might appeal your ban by contacting a special appointed moderator to judge if the ban was abusive.

Special appointed mod can create jury like conversation with randomly chosen users with jury votes to decide if bans are legit or not.]

Thank you for being a part of the Ask Me Anything (AMA) community. Let's engage in enlightening discussions, share knowledge, and create an inclusive space that values respect and diversity!

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Aunt: I'm going to Walmart, do you need anything?

Me: no thanks, I'm going there later to do some shopping myself

Aunt: But we could combine trips! It's wasteful to both drive there on the same day! The responsible thing to do---

Me: ok, I give up. Please get me cat litter and cat snacks.

Aunt: Ok!!!! :)) Which ones? And what isle? What color is the package---

Me: exasperated Are you serious? I caved and gave you what you wanted. Now you're asking for more information? I told you I wanted to do my own shopping, and you fought me on it. I'm making a peace offering by giving you two items to buy for me, and you're saying I need to go find the names and package colors and isle numbers? Please just be satisfied with what I gave you.

The thing that she wants is to feel good about buying me something. But I don't want that. That's the disagreement.

I imagine most people would see me as the asshole here: she can't buy the right item if I don't tell her what it is. But I clearly don't care about those details; if I wanted something specific I would have told her that. The only reason I mentioned them was to appease her. I'm giving her something she wanted, something I wanted for myself, and she's demanding more.

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[–] zagaberoo@beehaw.org 4 points 2 days ago

I can't interpret your comments in this thread any other way than that you are seeking not help, but validation for your unwillingness to grow.

The idea of help you're complaining about is quite consistent with good help according to the local lemmyites it seems, and I have to agree. Are you quite sure you're not minimizing others pain and ignoring context when it's convenient for you? Just because your pain is real does not mean you are free of responsibility.

This is exactly the kind of thing professional help is ideal for. Let an expert guide you in discovering ways you might change your views and behavior such that your needs are better met. Shaking your fist at the world isn't going to make you one iota happier, no matter how well justified your anger might be.