this post was submitted on 08 Dec 2024
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Well, I have a parent that is right on the edge of dislike that I keep them in my life for the sake of family harmony. But I consider them to be a bad person that makes me extremely uncomfortable to be around.

If you had something similar, and they died, how did it make you feel?

I'm purely curious because right now I feel like I would happy that they are out of my life, but sad for my family, but overall happier. And I want to understand if I'm being naive about the hardship of losing a parent, even a disliked one.

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[–] Laristal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I see this in my future. My mom has made my life a living hell emotionally speaking for years now. It was bad enough before Covid, but still tolerable. After Covid, suffice to say she drank all the antivax koolaid and has tried to shove it down my throat at every opportunity.

Frustratingly, she's also one of the only people who regularly keeps in touch with me. I've already gone low contact but I am not currently in a situation where I can fully cut her off. The low contact part bothers her immensely since she refuses to understand how her actions over the years has pushed me away.

The sad part is, I feel bad about cutting her off. I want a good relationship with both my parents, especially before something like this happens. For this, and many other reasons not relevant to this thread, my life's a long string of frustration, regret, loneliness, and pain. I don't see it getting better any time soon. I'm so tired of all the pain and emotional turmoil.

[–] MTK@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm sorry you have to go through that, I hope things get better ❤️

[–] Laristal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Thanks, I really appreciate it. I am working on making some things better for myself. Its just hard to keep up motivation some says when progress is slow due to other factors and the regret and frustration play on on daily loop most days.

[–] MTK@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I get that, it's really hard, and it's okay to sometimes take a day off from trying, I just hope you always find the will to invest in yourself and in your happiness eventually.