this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2024
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[–] Trekman10@sh.itjust.works 31 points 4 days ago (6 children)

Just waiting for the day when someone can explain to me what makes a man a man without describing skills, qualities, and actions that anyone can do regardless of gender.

And don't tell me it's "have a penis", because if that were true then effeminate men wouldn't be insulted all the time for not being "real" men, and there wouldn't be toxic masculinity.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'm a man because I say I'm a man and fuck anyone who tells me otherwise.

And that applies to anyone with any gender. Because it's not about anyone but that person.

[–] Jumi@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I never said I would be doing the fucking.

[–] Jumi@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)
[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago

Same question for women. Gender is only useful insofar as we decide it is. We have an inherent nature to categorize and differentiate, and in some cases that makes a lot of sense, but outside of strictly biological facts, that distinction between genders is nebulous at best.

Like religion, gender identity is personal, even if it stems from society. No two people will share the same opinion, it'd probably be weird if they did, and as long as they're not using their opinion as basis for fact, do whatever you want, man woman or anyone in between, outside, or around the spectrum.

[–] dragonfucker@lemmy.nz 4 points 4 days ago

A man is someone who identifies as a man.

Yes, it's circular.

[–] daniskarma@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Gender is a social construct that is, gladly, starting to fail.

I hope that in some years people would stop refering to having any gender, and they'll just have the social behavior they'd like best when they like it best. And will only discuss their sex when it's medically relevant.

[–] LwL@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

Sadly unlikely because it's rooted in biological differences (mainly hormones), so on average there will be sex-based differences. I'd love it if people stopped stereotyping because of that but I doubt itll ever happen. Maybe we can at least get rid of the idea of gendered hobbies and such, but even then most people want to identify as part of a group so there will likely always be some association.

[–] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 days ago

It's less that the social construct is failing, and more that we're finally letting it flourish.

Tying the way you present to the world to one of two options often linked to your gonads is extremely limiting. What you describe isn't the failure of gender, it's an explosion of genders.

[–] Ultraviolet@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

A featherless biped or a miserable little pile of secrets, take your pick.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Idk, but i feel like it's just being who you are and respecting yourself.
Same as a woman being a woman.
Anyone that's confident in who they are isn't going to care or announce it.

All the blustering either way is just yelling "im a grown ass man/woman!" outside of a grocery store at 1 am.