this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2024
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I have a couple times. The last time was a couple years ago with someone I met online who I was getting to know but didn't like after the first date. They asked if I felt like watching some movie and I didn't respond and they didn't follow up. Tbh, I probably would've answered if they had sent a second text. I guess I avoided telling them the truth but it stuck with me like a pebble in my shoe and I feel bad thinking about it.

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 3 points 1 week ago

I don't think not responding to someone after a single date is ghosting, but I may be using the term differently than the majority. I feel like you need to know someone longer before it's considered ghosting.

I ghosted someone I knew on Discord. They were exceptionally clingy. Like message me four times a day, every day, without me messaging in between. Message me the second I get online. It was so annoying. Constantly asking me if I was mad at them after I didn't answer them immediately. Even after I told them I wasn't mad and not to think I am if I don't answer. I told them so many times that the only thing that was annoying me was them thinking I was annoyed when I don't answer immediately. Just so so pouty all the time. I couldn't handle it.

I took a break from Discord for other reasons and when I came back I just ignored them. I couldn't handle it anymore.

From the way other people talked to them on servers and things they said, I get the feeling this is a common pattern with them. They start to make some friends, then get super clingy and sobby if you don't answer them right away and people get frustrated and stop talking to them. Which sucks, but, I'd told them so so so many times exactly what they were doing that was annoying me and they never stopped. It's so infuriating for someone to just be so sad about something and for you to try and tell them in no uncertain terms "I'm not mad at you, but when you think I am mad because I don't answer right away it makes me annoyed. Just stop that. That's all I'm upset about."