this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2024
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If anyone can find more pixels for me i would appreciate it.

Thanks y'all.

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[โ€“] SweetCitrusBuzz@beehaw.org 6 points 18 hours ago (3 children)

A lot of trans femmes myself included cannot see 'guys' as gender neutral no matter how hard we try and so do not like it.

[โ€“] verdigris@lemmy.ml 2 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I have regularly called groups of females "you guys" since childhood. It's extremely neutral in a lot of the country.

[โ€“] SweetCitrusBuzz@beehaw.org 4 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (1 children)

Okay, but not everybody is going to be comfortable with it and so are you saying you would not change your speech for them?

Also which country?

[โ€“] verdigris@lemmy.ml 4 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

The US. And yes, I will continue to use the phrase "you guys" because it's a phrase that means "you people". I can't anticipate every illogical thing that will offend people. If someone called me out on it in person I would try not to use the phrase to address them specifically but I would also think they were being very silly.

[โ€“] SweetCitrusBuzz@beehaw.org 3 points 11 hours ago

It always confuses me when people say 'offend' people, because usually it is not offense they feel etc.

Well, that's not a very fair way of treating/thinking of people, some people are going to be hurt or upset by certain things and it's better to understand that we all have emotions and they are not pointless just because you see no value in them i.e. 'illogical'. It's better to work together and find ways of communicating that aren't genuinely hurtful ioo.

[โ€“] LainTrain@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (2 children)

That's rough. That said as a trans woman (no idea what a trans-femme is) I don't see a problem with it in the context of "you guys".

I use "dude" as a general exclamation towards my own also-trans gf sometimes even. Really y'all oughta chill on the language policing. If you pass people will treat you like the gender you look like, if you don't, they won't really, no matter how much they try, and your main issue is not passing and thus money which can fix that, not other people and their language use.

[โ€“] apotheotic@beehaw.org 6 points 16 hours ago

Oof. Passing is an archaic concept, just use the language for people that doesn't make them feel uncomfortable.

[โ€“] SweetCitrusBuzz@beehaw.org 2 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

A trans femme is someone who tries to make themselves look more 'femme' often through taking estrogen etc, it can refer to trans women as well but also refers to those who don't completely identify or at all as a woman, see nonbinary folks for example. It's kind of a catch all term.

Who said anything bout language policing? I was merely saying for myself. I think passing is a pointless binary concept and not even all cis women 'pass'. So I'm not all that interested in passing 100%, just being happy to be me.

[โ€“] Mirodir@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 18 hours ago

People who claim "guys" is gender neutral would most often only count men when asked the question "How many guys did you sleep with in your life?"

Until I find a single person who immediately thinks of people of any gender at that question, I will not fall for the internalized misogyny of "'guys' is gender neutral" meme. (Same with "dudes" and all the other ones I've seen over the years. I've even seen someone say "bro" is gender neutral.)