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I love telling whiny users who claim they've always had "this" problem that I cannot fix what I do not know is broken. If there's no ticket, then nothing is broken, so quit your whining.
Don't you just love when a user submits a ticket that's "super urgent, this is preventing me from doing my job!" and when you ask how long it's been happening: "Oh, about a month"
My personal favorite is the people that say it is a hair on fire emergency but then you can never get a hold of them to fix the problem.
Submits ticket at 4:50p that it’s an emergency. Ping them at 4:55p for clarification but they’re gone, get pinged at 8:02a with “why isn’t this fixed?”
That’s because nobody helped when their hair was on fire, and now they’re dead.
It wasn’t critical till now and they were hoping it’d fix itself before then. “But sir, these aren’t rechargeable batteries, nor do we have one of our interns go around and check all the batteries every day”