this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2024
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submitted 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) by Fal@yiffit.net to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

So I know everyone is going to answer "yes", but I want actual real thoughts. I just want to know where I fit in.

I'm AMAB, and present as male, at least on the surface. I've always felt that was wrong though. But I don't necessarily think I'm a woman. I wish I was more feminine. And recently I started full body laser hair removal, and I have pretty long hair, and currently have my toe nails painted. But I also have a beard, and otherwise present totally as cis.

Am I "trans"? I don't feel "cis", but I feel like calling myself trans just isn't accurate and is inappropriate. Is there any other option?

And a complicating factor is that I'm basically only attracted to female presenting people. I see a lot of mtf trans people posting online "t4t". Would other trans people consider me "trans"?

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[–] LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I find it interesting that you don't "necessarily think" that you're a woman. There are many other options besides being a woman, as other commenters have shared. You mention having a beard and presenting as a cis man, but you don't elaborate on how that makes you feel. Simply having your body be a certain way doesn't dictate whether you can be a woman or be transgender. Our bodies and presentations are malleable. Do you like having a beard? It's okay whether you do or don't, there's no right answer. Being transfem isn't a sum of traits it's a statement of our identities.

Gender and sexuality are wholly distinct from each other, as well. You can be attracted to people (or not) in any particular way and still be a certain gender.