dandelion

joined 8 months ago

Well, I hope things get better. I can suggest all the obvious things: find a local mutual aid group to raise the $200 for the passport fee, I think right now a lot of liberals would love to support a trans person in need. Maybe you have friends or family who would be willing to help, but even if not there might be a local trans community you could try to connect with and they might be able to help or know people able to help.

Either way, I understand if the challenges are too great - some things can remain perpetually out of reach.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago (2 children)

is the issue money, or time, or both?

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 days ago

ah, maybe I had it backwards, maybe it was a 2 point lead that Trump had over Harris? Anyway, thank you so much for the link, that's really helpful!

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

72 million voters voted for Trump, that's not equivalent with embracing Trump's hatred. Trump's base is bigoted and hateful, but that doesn't mean every voter is. A lot of them seem clueless, by all accounts. I think a lot of them were just voting against the incumbent because they were upset about price gouging and inflation.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I think Harris had a 2 point lead among male voters age 18 - 29. Where is the 2% stat from, I would like to learn more (if it's convenient to share).

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 days ago

is there a history I don't know about? lol

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Been planting tulips, hyacinth, crocus, and peony. Need to plant my garlic!

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

might be worth reading Susan Stryker's Transgender History

I also found Stone Butch Blues provided some useful historical context.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago

that's good ❤️

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

State violence is usually not a civil-war style showdown, instead it is often a slow and indirect process, and the worst forms of the violence are outsourced to police forces and prison wardens. This is the asymmetry between the oppressed and the oppressors, they can afford to maintain the appearance of moral righteousness while perpetuating violence indirectly.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I would encourage you to not assume votes for Trump were necessarily endorsements of what he stands for. My vote for Harris certainly wasn't an endorsement of her policies (such as pro-Israel, pro-fracking, etc.). Like many people, I vote for the lesser evil.

Lots of people are voting Trump out of anger about inflation and price-gouging. Sure, his base is made up of bigoted individuals, but I'm talking about the people who voted for Obama, Trump in 2016, Biden in 2020, and Trump in 2024 - these voters are mostly working class folks, they are more diverse than you would think, and they are mostly upset about the economy and punishing the incumbent for not taking better care of them.

We can criticize these voters until we're red in the face and there are plenty of legitimate critiques, but it's helpful to remember the rage of poor people rarely gets channeled in healthy or constructive ways. I believe Frantz Fanon noted this about the violence that boils up in response to colonial imperialism, and while it doesn't directly apply here, I think there are some similarities worth considering.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Might be a good time to check your documents, make sure you have a U.S. passport, that it isn't expired, etc.

134
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

Link to poll: https://www.dataforprogress.org/blog/2024/10/23/voters-prefer-candidates-who-are-supportive-of-transgender-rights-think-recent-political-ads-have-gotten-mean-spirited-and-out-of-hand

When voters are asked whether they are more inclined to support a candidate who backs transgender rights or one who opposes them, voters overwhelmingly choose the candidate in favor of transgender rights, by a margin of 21 points. This trend holds true among Independents, with a 19-point preference. Even 22% of Republicans indicate they are more likely to support a candidate who favors trans rights—a significantly higher percentage than the share of Democrats who would back a candidate opposing them.

Furthermore, voters showed frustration with the wave of anti-trans advertisements. When asked if they thought political attack ads against the transgender community have gotten mean spirited and out of hand, far more voters agree than disagree (+28 points). This finding holds true for independents (+23 points) as well, with even 31% of Republicans finding that there were too many political attack ads.

 

Just wondering for those who have seen it, what your thoughts are about the recent documentary Will & Harper.

 

Musk announced the $1 million giveaway at an event in Harrisburg, Pa., on Saturday. The event was part of a tour supporting Trump.

“I have a surprise for you," Musk said shortly before bringing out a giant check. "We are going to be awarding $1 million to people who have signed the petition — every day, from now until the election.”

"If you look at the conditions, you must be a registered voter," Hasen said. "And so this is essentially a lottery that's open only to people who register to vote. So it’s either an incentive for someone to vote or it’s a reward. And either way, it violates federal law."

He calls Musk's actions "clearly illegal" because it violates statute 52 U.S.C. 10307(c) and the Department of Justice’s election manual.

Hasen said willful violation of statute 52 U.S.C. 10307(c) comes with a $10,000 fine and up to five years in prison.

"I don't think it would be likely that he would suffer such a serious fine," Hasen said of Musk. "Although, if he was warned that this is illegal activity and continued to do it, I think that would create a different kind of situation."

 

I can't seem to shake imposter syndrome or doubts about whether I'm "trans" or whether I'm a woman, etc.

Just wondering what you all do when you feel that way, if you have any recommendations?

It makes me feel awful, there is so much commitment to a transition it feels like you have to be certain, but I just don't have constant certainty.

Sometimes I'll sit down and try to analyze it objectively, basically considering the "null hypothecis" - if I am not trans, then I would be cis, if I were cis then a certain set of things would be true (like, estrogen would probably not feel so great, testosterone would not make me depressed, etc.).

 

Just wanted to put it on your radar in case you didn't know about the show (I only found out about it by accident). I think it's available on Netflix.

The show was written by an enby and the cast includes a trans man and Suzy Eddie Izzard.

 

Hello, I was wondering if anyone has recommendations for tools to help with digital detox / digital minimalism.

I struggle with mild impulsivity. Whenever I open my computer I almost automatically open a browser and check social media.

It used to be a problem primarily with Reddit and news sites, but since joining Lemmy my behavior has switched to regularly checking Lemmy.

I'm looking for any tools or advice, whether cognitive-behavioral or technical like browser extensions.

In the past I used the Firefox extension called Redirector to redirect myself from certain subreddits like /r/all to something more benign (I like /r/sewing or /r/books for example), and this intervention helped break up automatic behavior and was a kind of harm reduction: still feeding the impulsivity, but with healthier content.

I was wondering if there is something like Redirector that redirects randomly with some probability (like 20% of the time it redirects to the target you specify).

 

Hi, just wondering if anyone else has a similar struggle as me.

Sometimes when I'm thinking in my mind, I have a voice (I know not everyone experiences this, but it sounds common enough) and this "inner" narrative voice has habituated to a masculine sounding voice.

I have noticed when I'm feeling connected with my gender and it's easier to stick with a feminized voice when speaking aloud (i.e. to others, not internal), my internal voice is likewise easier to be subconsciously feminine as well.

Some days I have a really good gender day and I wake up the next morning and my mind has reverted back to that masculine-sounding voice in my head. This isn't necessarily inherently distressing as much as it can feel invalidating or make me feel doubt and cognitive dissonance, like I am not a valid woman because my unconscious has this masculine voice, or the internal masculine voice makes it harder to feel authentic using my feminine voice. Some mornings I try to consciously make it sound more feminine and that is helpful, but some mornings it can feel overwhelming or difficult to constantly correct that masculine voice, and the practice becomes a bit like when I try to use my feminine voice with others - an exercise that makes me feel inauthentic, fake, performative, and anxious.

So far the only real solution I have to these dual problems of habituation (for inner voice and outer) is to just keep trying and persist. I have a tendency towards perfectionism, which makes me feel constantly like I am failing, and this can lead me to feel less motivated to keep trying. However, I am continuing to make an effort. I find having a weekly speech therapy appointment keeps me engaged in that process, and from letting it drop due to other pressures. It also usually makes me feel extremely affirmed, as my therapist is much happier with my progress than I am, and this usually results in finding using my femme voice easy and natural (though usually this only lasts the rest of the day, again, sleeping seems to reset everything and the next morning I wake up with a masculine voice again).

Was wondering if anyone else has habituated their inner narrative voice, how long it took for them to do that (or if they just stopped noticing or it became less relevant?), and if anyone has tips for overcoming the anxiety of using your voice in everyday situations.

I feel like forcing myself over and over into the situations has been effective in reducing how anxious I feel. Over time it has gone from feeling like I almost physically couldn't do it and a rising panic sensation to now it just feels like a bit of performance anxiety right before and I usually slip into it without too much issue - though sustaining it over a long period when speaking a lot can be challenging, and how anxious I feel seems connected to how confident I feel in my gender.

So to summarize, things that have worked for me:

  • noticing masculine inner narrative voice and willfully feminizing it in my head when I notice
  • persisting in forcing myself to feminize my voice at work and in public full-time, even when it is terrifying and just continuing to get regular exposure and ignoring the anxiety that is there
  • building confidence in my gender with styling my hair, wearing jewelry, putting on makeup, wearing feminine clothes, etc. help a little with getting on-board with using a feminine voice (I think of it as I have to pass to myself before I feel like I can try to pass with others, so finding ways to look more like your gender to yourself to build confidence will help with using your voice)

Wondering if anyone else has experiences to share or advice.

Thank you!

 

Hi!

tl;dr after injecting the same amount of estradiol valerate (subq) for a month or so, I started to experience more dysphoria and signs of testosterone (esp. mental) started to come back. Any reason this might be?

Longer version / details:

I injected 5 mg (0.25 mL) of estradiol valerate subq into my thighs every four days for a while, and for a couple weeks I started injecting into my abdomen instead to avoid blood supplies.

This dose seemed like more than enough. In the past 3.4 mg every 3 days gave me blood estradiol levels of ~350 pg/mL at trough. Recent labs showed 5 mg every 4 days had ~300 pg/mL at trough for me, which was lower than I expected.

It's a good level, but I was having weird dysphoric experiences that commonly happen when my hormones are out of wack (usually when I'm taking too little estrogen). Things like really doubting my gender identity, depression (lack of motivation, lethargic), anhedonia (little pleasure, flat affect, often leads to craving short-term reward behaviors). Physiological signs of T were not as evident in this case, and the dysphoria was not as severe as in the past when my estrogen was too low. Still, it seemed a lot like my estrogen was too low.

I increased my dose to 5.4 mg and the dysphoria went away within a day and I felt amazing and continued to feel amazing. I intended to switch to 5.4 mg / 4 days instead, but on day 3 I could feel my hormones coming down and trusting my experience I injected 5 mg a day early with the intention of trying 5 mg / 3 days (which is a lot more than I have taken before in terms of what this should do to my overall levels). Still not sure what I will do next. Part of me wants to stick with a 4 day cycle to keep lower peaks and to minimize overall levels (out of principle, I know injecting is not as risky as oral routes).

I'm trying to figure out why a stable dose that seems so high and was for the most part effective would suddenly not be "enough" (assuming that's indeed what's happening).

For context I'm close to 4 months on HRT, I took bicalutamide for a bit but stopped because I don't think it helped my mental symptoms and that's the most important therapeutic goal for me with taking HRT. I switched to monotherapy after 2 months which is when I started the 5 mg / 4 days.

I've heard sometimes the body can go through phases as it adjusts to estrogen early in HRT, so maybe this is just one of those lurches or adjustments?

Anyway here are some guesses I came up with:

  • I gained some weight (like 15 lbs), some maybe I need a little more EV than before?
  • injecting into abdomen depots the oil differently than the thigh, so maybe I am seeing a slower or lower circulation of EV (or alternatively a much faster circulation that is causing a crash earlier?)
  • maybe the estrogen receptors are downregulating due to taking too high of a dose too regularly? (I see lots of debate about whether this is a thing, mostly people on Reddit rejecting the idea that this has any clinical relevance.)

Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this or has suggestions.

Thanks so much!

50
What does "non-binary" mean? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

Non-binary seems like it could have several non-compatible meanings, so I wanted to list some of those meanings and see if there are any others out there I don't know.

One way I could think of non-binary is as being a kind of third gender category, like there are men, women, and non-binary people. In this sense of non-binary a butch woman who considers themselves a woman would not be non-binary because they are a woman.

Sometimes non-binary is used like "genderqueer" is sometimes used, as a generic description of anyone who doesn't fit perfectly in the narrow confines of the binary genders (i.e. men and women). In this sense a butch woman could see themselves as a woman, but also as genderqueer and non-binary, as they do not conform to binary gender norms for women.

Another way non-binary seems to be used (related to genderqueer in its historical context) is as a political term, an identity taken up by otherwise cis-sexual and even cis-gendered people who wish to resist binary gender norms and policing. In this sense even a femme cis-sexual woman might identify as non-binary. Sometimes this political identity label might come with a gender expression that cuts against the gender expectations for the assigned sex at birth, but it doesn't have to. (I recently met two people whose gender expressions matched their assigned sex at birth but who identified as non-binary in this political sense.)

I was wondering what other meanings of non-binary are out there, and how they are commonly used.

Note: gatekeeping what is "really" non-binary seems pointless to me, since I agree with Wittgenstein that "language is use".

I know people get heated about policing what a word means (and I am guilty of this myself), but in the interest of inclusion, pluralism, and general cooperation in our community I think we can find a way to communicate with overlapping and different meanings of a shared term.

27
caesar salad pizza (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/veganhomecooks@lemmy.world
 

More photos of the pizza being made: https://imgur.com/a/npeE1e8

based on this recipe (not intended as an endorsement):

https://www.eatfigsnotpigs.com/chicken-caesar-salad-pizza-vegan/

toppings:

  • herbed compound butter (fresh parsley, minced garlic, oregano)
  • tomato slices
  • red onion slices
  • mozz.
  • breaded and fried tofu (as a kind of chkn)
  • caesar salad dressing (mayo, cashew cream, mustard, capers, parm, lemon juice)
  • lettuce
  • parm
  • bacon bits (used this recipe)
 

I recently had an injection that seemed to go wrong (CW: blood, I inject EV subq and I hit something like a capillary, there was a lot of blood and it bruised badly afterwards). Within a couple days I felt unusually dysphoric as a result of what I assume was a failure for the oil to depot and slowly release over time.

I get these "dysphoric thoughts" that maybe the estrogen is causing the problems, that I don't have objective proof that I'm trans, etc. Lots of doubt, paranoia, and increasing amounts of anxiety and irrational fear (about transition, but also in general, e.g. thinking spiders are in my bed), and I start to experience depression and anhedonia (things aren't as pleasurable, everything feels pretty flat emotionally, I just feel "bad").

Of course when I inject again and it goes well, I feel much better and I forget about these problems.

I was just wondering if anyone has advice on how to deal with dysphoria when there are gaps in the HRT. Obviously in the long term, surgery will fix the hormone issue and I suspect that will fix this problem. Until then, though, I am stuck in a rather fragile place where I feel normal (even good, even amazing) when my estrogen levels are high and suppressing my testosterone. Any small slip in that and I barely function as a person.

Before HRT I would just do whatever I could to increase mental well-being:

  • physical exertion (aerobic exercise, weightlifting, etc.)
  • going outside and getting sunshine
  • keeping up with hydration
  • keeping good sleep hygiene (sleeping enough, going to sleep at the same times, etc.)
  • meditation every day

But now it feels harder for me to "bootstrap" when there are gaps in HRT and my hormones aren't right, it's like I'm no longer used to how hard it was before.

Anyway - any tips or thoughts, would like to hear other's experiences.

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