WhatAnOddUsername

joined 4 years ago
[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago (3 children)

My understanding is that Lovecraftian horror often involves people driven insane by things beyond their comprehension. But I'm confused all the time and there are TONS of things beyond my comprehension, so I don't really see what the big deal is.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 4 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I've uninstalled the addicting idle games from my phone and haven't broken in and reinstalled them since Tuesday. Hopefully I'm able to keep that up for a while.

I've made a rule for myself that, every time I sit down at my computer, I have to write at least one sentence in my masters thesis before doing anything else. It seems to be causing me to get at least a bit of work done, although nothing ever feels like it's happening fast enough.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I just found out the rumours of JD Vance fucking a couch were made up. I can't tell you how disappointed I am. As a couchfucker myself, I was hoping to finally be able to vote for someone who represents my interests. Sadly, I will no longer be voting for Trump/Vance this election.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 13 points 5 months ago

If I had a nickel every time a Kennedy lost part of their brain, I'd have at least 4 nickels by now.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

But, I thought Biden was the only one capable of defeating Trump and anyone who disagreed was a secret Republican who wanted Trump to win?

Well, don't worry, Biden supporters. I've taken your arguments to heart, and you can rest assured that I'll write in Biden this fall, no matter who the Democrats decide to run. It's the only way to defeat Trump.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 22 points 7 months ago

See, I genuinely don't know whether you're joking or not.

 

Something I've found about myself is that I'm always addicted to some kind of screen-based media.

So, for example, I used to be really into mobile idle games. Then when I forced myself to give that up, I found myself scrolling through social media for hours at a time. When I force myself to give that up, I find myself playing mindless puzzle games on my computer for hours at a time.

Whenever I give up one addiction, I end up picking up another. This suggests to me that there is a deeper need here that is going unaddressed. It suggests that simple techniques to get rid of a habit (e.g. "Try deleting the game from your phone!") aren't sufficient in the long term. But I'm not sure what to do about that.

Ideally, I would like to be able to talk to a therapist about this. But since I'm back on a waitlist to see a therapist, I don't think that's going to happen for quite a while. I've been attempting to do other things for my mental health (meditation, journaling, exercise) but I find that the problem of my screen addiction continues to persists.

Every so often, in discussions about mental health, I see people recommending workbooks as an alternative for people unable to access therapy. I've been skeptical about this, but on reflection, it seems like that might be the right amount of structure for me. Meditation and journaling and exercise aren't really directed towards a specific problem the way a converation with a therapist can be, and if there are workbooks or similar resources that would help me work through this problem, I think it's worth a shot.

My ideal situation would be an interactive online or physical workbook that give me prompts for writing and reflection within a structure, e.g. I don't just want a book or series of YouTube videos I can passively read or watch (I can easily find those -- HealthyGamerGG is a well known resource on YouTube) but I also don't want to be told to just generically journal about my life (I'm already doing that).

If anyone knows about such a resource, please let me know.

[–] WhatAnOddUsername@hexbear.net 0 points 3 years ago (1 children)

This was something I posted just before the last megathread got unpinned, and I wanted to consider it a bit further:

In many parts of the internet, I often see “wholesome” posts and memes that say something vague and positive like “You are amazing!” or “You’re beautiful!” or “You’re valid!” My personal reaction to these posts is generally skepticism, partly because whoever posted it almost certainly didn’t have me in mind, and it’s a bit like if someone I’ve never met came up to me in real life and started praising and complimenting me – my first thought would be, “This person is being insincere and they probably want something from me” (which may be true in a sense, e.g. the person might want likes and comments on their post).

But I get the sense that this isn’t how most people feel about such posts. Which means that there’s something that everyone else gets out of such posts that I don’t, and there’s something about everyone else that I don’t understand. So, I ask with sincerity and the intention to understand, can anyone describe the value they get out of these general vaguely positive posts of affirmation?

The responses I got emphasized the importance of sincerity in the person expressing love for the audience of the message -- which, if the message is on the internet where everyone can see it, is potentially everyone in the world. Wanting the best for everyone in the world is a tall order.

And yeah, I guess that is a bit of a sticking point for me. It's easy to say "I love and wish the best for all people everywhere", but it's very difficult to practice it. So many people claim to love all living things in the universe one moment, and then go on the internet and tell people they don't like to kill themselves the next moment. If you say you "love" everyone, then in what sense do you "love" Donald Trump, Elon Musk, Joe Biden, Vaush, Kamala Harris, J.K. Rowling, Jeff Bezos, Pete Buttigieg, Jeffrey Epstein, Mike Cernovich, Andy Ngo, Ben Shapiro, Marjorie Taylor Greene, the woman who made the Giggle app, and everyone else whose existence makes you angry? I'm not saying it's impossible, but I do think it means you have to have have a deep answer to the question "What is love?" (an answer which goes beyond "Baby, don't hurt me").

There are few people I can think of who I think really have that kind of love for humanity, a love that's even capable of including the people listed above. As much of a cliche as it is, the first person who comes to mind is Mister Rogers, but I would also include certain activists such as Martin Luther King Jr or Leslie Feinberg. Like, if MLK said that he loves even the Marjorie Taylor Greenes of the world and wants to liberate them from the hatred they carry in their hearts, I'd believe him. But that's not just because of his words -- it's because his words were backed up by his actions.

I do think it's good to try to cultivate some kind of universal love for all humanity and all living things, but I wish people would be honest and acknowledge how difficult it is, and how often we fail at it. I'm an atheist, but this is one thing I've always found interesting about Christianity and the Christian individuals I respect most -- this idea of aiming to love everyone as Jesus did, but also acknowledging that we are all sinners who will fall short of godly perfection, and understanding that to practice this love is a lifelong challenge and not just something you can make a wholesome meme about and be done with it.

I'm not sure if I have a point. Maybe I'm just being way too solemn about the word "love", and maybe I'm taking internet posts too seriously for my own good.