Sorry that happened to you. Them murderers do seem to be trying to clear their conscience by putting others down sometimes. Last week a coworker was on about how those plants might feel pain. Real cringe.
I don't do cakes much so I can't rly offer much advice on that. In my experience baking just takes a few tries to adjust the moisture in your dough and the baking time/tempertaure in your oven (every oven is a bit different) and even then it might somtimes go a bit wrong.
"I am flabbergasted" how any man can project so much.