this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2024
368 points (93.6% liked)

Programmer Humor

32557 readers
695 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
(page 3) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] litchralee@sh.itjust.works 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

I'm surprised there aren't more suggestions which use intentionally-similar abbreviations. The American customary system is rich with abbreviations which are deceptively similar, and I think the American computer memory units should match; confusion is the name of the game. Some examples from existing units:

  • millimeter (mm) vs thou (mil)
  • meter (m) vs mile (mi)
  • kilo (k) vs grand (G)
  • kilonewtons (kN) vs knots (kn)
  • statute mile (m/sm) vs survey mile (mi) vs nautical mile (NM/nmi) vs nanometer (nm)
  • foot (ft) vs fathom (ftm)
  • chain (ch) vs Switzerland (ch)
  • teaspoon (tsp) vs tablespoon (tbsp)
  • ounce (oz) vs fluid ounce (fl oz) vs troy ounce (ozt) vs Australia (Ozzie)
  • pint (pt) vs point (pt)
  • grain (gr) vs gram (g)
  • Kelvin (K) vs Rankine (R; aka "Kelvin for Americans")
  • short ton (t) vs long ton (???) vs metric tonne (t) vs refrigeration ton (TR)
[–] melmi@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

We already have a confusing abbreviation: B vs b. One is bits, one is bytes.

It's a pretty drastic difference. One Gb per second is only 125 MB per second. Don't mess up your capitalization!

[–] litchralee@sh.itjust.works 3 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

It's for this reason I sometimes spell out the Bytes or bits. Eg: 88 Gbits/s or 1.44 MBytes

It's also especially useful for endianness and bit ordering: MSByte vs MSbit

[–] barsoap@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

The knot is non-SI but perfectly metric and actually makes sense as a nautical mile is exactly one degree meridian. kn also doesn't clash with kN, Newtons are always written with capital N. Capitalisation generally matters. No standard abbreviation exists for nautical miles but definitely don't use nm because ~~newton~~nano metres.

That is, if you take all those colonial units out of there suddenly you're left with SI units and things that work well with SI units.

Oh and a pint is 500ml, a pound is 500g, a hundredweight is 50kg (because 100 pound), and a teaspoon is rather approximate because everyone outside of North America will use an actual spoon you stir tea with. The important part is not the precise amount but distinguishing it from "a pinch" etc. I guess by extension ounces should be 25ml and 25g. While we're at it: An inch is 25mm, and a foot an even 1/3rd of a metre while a yard is exactly one metre.

Did you know that a Newton metre is about exactly one chocolate bar metre? The work it takes to lift it in about standard gravity, that is. Very intuitive.

t for ton is a quirk in SI, you can use Mg if you want. There's also other SI-adjacent strangeness such as the hectare, which is one hecto-are: While SI has meters for length and litres for volume somehow the are isn't official for area.

[–] Perhyte@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

No standard abbreviation exists for nautical miles but definitely don’t use nm because newton metres

Since as you mentioned Newtons are N not n, Newton meters are Nm. nm means nanometer.

[–] barsoap@lemm.ee 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

yep brainfart too many newtons in the sentence before that

[–] litchralee@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

The knot is non-SI but perfectly metric and actually makes sense as a nautical mile is exactly one degree meridian

I do admire the nautical mile for being based on something which has proven to be continually relevant (maritime navigation) as well as being brought forward to new, related fields (aeronautical navigation). And I am aware that it was redefined in SI units, so there's no incompatibility. I'm mostly poking fun at the kN abbreviation; I agree that no one is confusing kilonewtons with knots, not unless there's a hurricane putting a torque on a broadcasting tower...

No standard abbreviation exists for nautical miles

We can invent one: kn-h. It's knot-hours, which is technically correct but horrific to look at. It's like the time I came across hp-h (horsepower-hour) to measure gasoline energy. :(

if you take all those colonial unit

In defense of the American national pride, I have to point out that many of these came from the Brits. Though we're guilty of perpetuating them, even after the British have given up on them haha

An inch is 25mm, and a foot an even 1/3rd of a metre while a yard is exactly one metre.

I'm a dual-capable American that can use either SI or US Customary -- it's the occupational hazard of being an engineer lol -- but I went into a cold sweat thinking about all the awful things that would happen with a 25 mm inch, and even worse things with 3 ft to the meter. Like, that's not even a multiple of 2, 5, or 10! At least let it be 40 inches to the meter. /s

There's also other SI-adjacent strangeness such as the hectare

I like to explain to other Americans that metric is easy, using the hectare as an example. What's a hectare? It's about 2.47 acre. Or more relatable, it's the average size of a Walmart supercenter, at about 107,000 sq ft.

1 hectare == 1 Walmart

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] BmeBenji@lemm.ee 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (5 children)

I propose the base measurement is a Reagit - equal to 36 bit states, or half-bits (36 was the age of Ronald Reagan when the transistor was first invented in 1947)

The next smallest is the Nuclearyte equal to the quantity of times the United States has proven technological superiority in war by using an atomic bomb offensively. So 2 Reagits is 1 Nuclearyte.

After that is the number of US presidents to have survived an assassination attempt (8) known simply as the ‘Merit (and don’t forget the apostrophe). 8 nuclearytes is 1 ‘merit.

Next is the number of years after the birth of Our Lord when Americans landed on the moon. 1969 ‘merits is 1 L-unit (pronounced like Loon)

Even bigger still is the number of amendments it took for the damn commie government to realize that alcohol is essential for human survival. The 18th amendment was a mistake, but the 21st amendment was blessed by Our Father who Art in Heaven without a doubt. 3 L-units is 1 chug

Next is the number of young men who died fighting for the rights of our United States to remain unquestioned by the damn commie federal government during the great war for individually united liberties between 1860 and 1865. 490,309 chugs is 1 Right

And so far we haven’t needed any larger measurements.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] the_crotch@sh.itjust.works 3 points 7 months ago (3 children)

1 kB is 1024 bytes and a byte is 8 bits. That is not metric. It just uses metric prefixes.

[–] Matombo@feddit.de 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

1kB is 1000B you are using KiB which Windows to this day calls KB -.-

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Andrew15_5@mander.xyz 3 points 7 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Klicnik@sh.itjust.works 2 points 8 months ago

Letter to Grandma, The Bible, Vacation photo album, and Video Collection

[–] j4k3@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

Octal. Start expressing it in maga Octal with thoughts prayers and bullets for ones

[–] BmeBenji@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago

These units are too logical and scientific for my free, spirited, emotional, irrational Christian brain so I need something that’s more intuitive.

[–] savvywolf@pawb.social 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 2 points 8 months ago

An Uvalde is the memory equivalent of PCM 48 kHz sample rate of children screaming.

[–] Adalast@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

We can use bits instead of bytes. That way it can look 8x bigger than it really is and have no real bearing to modern computing.

[–] John_McMurray@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

No, those are not metric, they just borrowed some prefixes, although it's not like metric designers invented those anyways.

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›