this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
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Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Bitter_Research2372 on 2023-07-18 14:30:47.


Yesterday, my parents sat me (31 M), my two brothers (32M, 34M) and my sister (41 F) down to discuss their will. My parents informed us that they want to split it five ways, my sister gets 2/5 while the three of us brothers get 1/5 each. Their reasoning is that my sister "sacrificed" her childhood for our family so its only fair she gets compensated.

In our childhood, my father's business partner screwed him over so there was a period where we were broke and in debt. My parents had to work multiple jobs to keep us afloat, and my sister babysat us while our parents worked. All she had to do was feed us and keep an eye on us. We were pretty calm kids so all we did was play games and do our homework. It probably wasn't thrilling, but not exactly a tremendous hardship.

I complained to my parents along with my brothers that its insane they want to give my sister 2/5 of the inheritance over that, especially since she's financially the best off out of all of us. She doesn't have any kids and a dual income with her partner.

My parents said they're disappointed in us, and said we need to reflect on ourselves. My sister didn't say shit while my parents spoke, but texted us afterwards that she had zero intention of taking 2/5 but we were all assholes.

AITA for feeling like this split is unfair?

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[–] curiousaur@lemmy.fmhy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

Yeah you're the asshole. 1/5 (20%) vs 1/4 (25%) is only a difference of 5% that you'd notice.

The fact that she's better off means nothing here, it should not be taken into account. You don't punish people for doing well or reward them for not.

It's your parents estate, nobody gets any say but them.

It sounds like if your sister didn't raise you kids, there wouldn't even be having this conversation because there wouldn't even be the inheritance.

You are 100% an asshole. You need to apologize to your parents and your sister, and encourage your brothers to do the same