this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2023
3 points (100.0% liked)

The Onion

4805 readers
1188 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 

WASHINGTON—Claiming to have acquired enough evidence to support the allegations, Pentagon officials held a press conference Wednesday to accuse China of being Chinese. “After a years-long investigation, we now have corroboration from numerous witnesses that China is definitely Chinese,” said Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin, explaining that surveillance shows the rival superpower has been amassing millions of Chinese people within its borders. “We have always suspected that China might be Chinese, but now we have discovered that President Xi Jinping and past leaders have been secretly letting Chinese ideology run rampant in their country for years. They’ve even gone so far as to invent an entire Chinese language and history; what else could they be hiding?” At press time, Pentagon officials claimed the situation had reached a level of concern they had not felt since they first suspected Russia of being Russian.

link: https://www.theonion.com/pentagon-accuses-china-of-being-chinese-1850912833

no comments (yet)
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
there doesn't seem to be anything here