Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Rich_Butterscotch242 on 2023-07-04 11:22:12+00:00.

This happened a month ago, but I just saw a post about not serving alcohol at a party that reminded me of this.

After I (22f) finished moving in to my first apartment, I invited my family over. My parents, siblings (3 of them) and their partners (2 of those).

Everyone knows I don't eat meat, I try my best not to be difficult about it and often bring my own meals to family gatherings.

Anyways, the menu was: as a starter, bruschetta, as a main, pasta alla norma with garlic bread and salad on the side. And tiramisu as dessert.

I thought this covered all bases, had enough variety, and people seemed to enjoy it. No one went home hungry.

But my dad told me that if he knew I wouldn't be serving meat he wouldn't have come, he made a couple of snarky remarks too (especially about the salad, 'rabbit food' 'this is what real food eats' etc.). And my brother called me after to let me know his girlfriend agrees with my dad and also would want 'real' food the next time, if I'm ever hosting again.

Honestly, I don't really want to host again. I spend quite a lot of money and time on the dinner, and it's frustrating when people try to tear it down. But it is generally polite to let people know when a social gathering doesn't meet expectations.

Should I have let people know beforehand?