this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2023
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My daughter is approaching 3 and my wife has suggested a tablet either as a birthday or Christmas present, and I’m a bit hesitant. It’d be great for long trips, but I think as a day-to-day thing it might be a distraction. It’d get Spidey and Friends off the telly though. How and when did you handle this?

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[–] B0NK3RS@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

In my opinion just don't bother until there is a valid reason to. We gave our eldest child one when she was about 3 years old and it was the cause of behaviour issues and really distracted from creative play.

Obviously there are different experiences to be had but I just wouldn't recommend it.

[–] franglais@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

As late as possible, hold off as long as you can, screens are terrible for early years brain development. We have a tablet for long car journeys,and my eldest has just got his first phone at 11 years old because he started high school.

[–] hystericallymad@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

From a father of 4, just don't. Our youngest has a tablet, but it is only accessible when Grandma is around because it goes with Grandma when she leaves. But when the child has it, non-stop YouTube play commercials. Omfg.. if I have to listen to another 30 minute video of someone opening an obscene amount of consumer garbage...

My younger 3 kids a different approach was taken and they all had tablets at a very young age. We used them to play Minecraft together while distanced.

Read to your kids, every day. Make it a routine 10 minutes before bed. Those 2-3 years of nightly reading, before they start on their own, will turn into comprehensive skills.

[–] FurtiveFugitive@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

We got a tablet for him about 3. It was only used for long road trips and even then just to watch 1 movie. He's 5 now and he gets 1 hour of screen time on it each weekday. However it's not a free for all situation. He has to spend about 30 minutes in an educational app first and then he's allowed to watch videos from a curated list.

I can see a huge difference in his behavior when he gets "too much" screen time. This is what works for us and every kid is different. I would recommend limiting screen time as much as possible without putting them too outside the social norms. At 3 that isn't a concern but at 5 he does have friends now and it's healthy for them to be able to bond over things they've both seen.

[–] Hanabie@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago

My kids, millennials, got their PCs when they were in their early teens, similar to how I, GenX, bought my own Amiga500 with cash I earned as a paperboy.

I'd probably get my kid a tablet when she enters primary school if I were to start again, but not a toddler. Pretty sure it has bad side effects for the brain at that age.

[–] alvvayson@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Age 2, but the big difference is that the tablet is controlled by us and has a pin only we know. They only have it when we provide it. So it was never gifted to them.

And often we prefer to just Chromecast to the TV so that we have full control over what is displayed.

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Too early.

My daughter was born on 10.01.2020 so when she was 8 weeks old and ready to meet the world we went into lockdown. She was about 18 months old when she figured out that daddys phone or mommys phone could make Bluey appear on the TV. And she literally spent a great deal of her first 2 years watching mummy work from home on a variety of screens. So the "screen free" household ship sailed hard.

Like all toddlers had absolutely no compuntions about picking up my phone absolutely whereever it was, trying to unlock it, failing and then yeeting it across the fucking room. Or walking up to you and straight snatching it out of your hand and just randomly pressing shit. So at about 2 she got her tablet. Now I locked that motherfucker down HARD, she had Khan Academy kids, a few games that were add free, and educational and Netflix. I deleted youtube, blocked everything I could or put it behind a password, and put family link on it.

The problem came about a year later from Nanny... who didnt lock HER Ipad down at all and showed my daughter that theres a wonderful catalogue of mind numbing games, most of which are laden with Adds or want $15 a month subscriptions behind one of the buttons. Not educational at all, let her watch youtube kids and showed her just how much wasnt on her tablet.

Now I kind of regret getting it for her, but as she is now approaching 4 and the reasoning skills are kicking in "No, you cant have your tablet because you didnt eat dinner" is actually something that makes sense. Its not so bad, its a great lever for "eat your dinner or no tablet time before we go upstairs" and all but "Tabbet" became just a little too needed to have her be well behaved than I like.

You know your kid, does she take "no" well? Does she take "Its run out of time today sweetheart" type statements well? Does she constantly try and demand Ice Cream for breakfast and throw a tantrum if she doesnt get it.? Because it WILL be a hit, I can absolutely guarantee it, but then you have to get them to put it down sometimes and eat, sleep or just go play.

Prime copy pasta material here. "Like all toddlers" doesn't really exist.

[–] jws_shadotak@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My kids don't even know what a tablet is. They aren't ever getting one unless they save up and buy one.

What will your kid do if she doesn't have one? Talk and play?

[–] ShittyRedditWasBetter@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You seem like the type to take tablet use to the other extreme.

[–] Tippon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago

My kid was about three or four. We got an Amazon kids fire tablet with the subscription, so that it's pretty locked down, but has lots of curated content available. You set the kid's age, and it shows relevant content, as well as anything that you specifically share from your Amazon account.

When my kid started school, there was content from the school on their website, so I side loaded the Google Play Store and installed Chrome and Gmail. It's not necessary, but it made some things easier.

We didn't use them, but I think there are built in restrictions that you can use, like only allowing a certain amount of time per day. I used the Google account to try to add the tablet to the Google Family system, but couldn't get it to work in the way that I wanted.

If you do get a tablet, add YouTube Kids and disable regular YouTube. There are no ads, and the content is curated.

[–] who8mydamnoreos@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It was weird when we had rules around the tablet my kid used every second of available screen time, when we let them self regulate their own usage it became just another toy they never use. We do bring it along for travel though.

[–] Xariphon@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

Not weird at all.

When you're controlling, they only get but so much, so every second matters.

Once they're free, there's no pressure, no consequences for using it like a normal human being.

When he was about 2. I was a bit hesitant at first, but the kids apps are pretty good. Lots of educational games that taught him numbers, letters and simple logic.

The parental controls on Android are very good too, so you can easily block stuff and set hours. Make sure you block YouTube. The kids channels you get are utter garbage.

[–] Oneeightnine 1 points 1 year ago

I think three is fine, provided it's used sparingly and with oversight from mummy and daddy. We got our daughter one at a similar time in her life and provided you stay on top of it and don't let it become a problem I see no issue with it.

I'd go as far as to say that most of the kids in her year group at school have access to them at home (yr1).

We offer limited TV time and have a tablet for travel but it's pretty limited to travel. IMO just make sure to disable auto play and set reasonable limits. At toddler you should watch with them and not just zone out. Ask them question, interact while watching.

[–] SonnyVabitch@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

7, with strict time limits and PEGI lock through the Google family link app.