this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2024
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[–] Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca 87 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

Even as a father I'll never understand the weird insecurity that dads like this experience. Like, am I thrilled that my kid is eventually going to grow up to probably grind and smash with her boyfriends behind the Quiznos? Of course not. But being brooding and possessive about it is weird. Maybe even Alabama kind of weird.

[–] thejml@lemm.ee 71 points 1 week ago (6 children)

I always find it interesting how some parents do this weird “don’t touch my daughter” but mix it with “give me grandkids!!”… like, you can’t have it both ways.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago

Throw stick! No take! Only throw!

[–] djsoren19@yiffit.net 27 points 1 week ago

Ah, but the doublethink is the point! Add in a lil religious hypocrisy, and oh baby you got a Southern American stew goin.

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 week ago

These occur at different life stages for children

Teenager years, "Don't touch my daughter." / "Don't impregnate anyone."

Mid twenty and later, "Grandbabies please."

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Maybe they're just really pro-adoption (not enough to do it themselves, though)

[–] PersnickityPenguin@lemm.ee 6 points 1 week ago

Nope, not at all. My parents berated me until I was 35 to "wait until you're ready to have kids." Then they were like, why are you waiting to have grandkids?! You've been married for 5 years!!!

[–] affiliate@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

their daughter can have kids, but only in a mary and joseph kind of way

[–] AtariDump@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Not with that attitude you can’t.

[–] vga@sopuli.xyz 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah my fear is that my kids will be like every teenager since the dawn of humanity and not care that much about long-term consequences.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

That's one weird thing in human, evolutionary: teenagers already get the drive (even more so than later) but the mind and body is not yet ready.

Wait, is that why we have grandparents?

Sorry, weird topic.

[–] Flummoxed@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

I 100% believe this is correct. Parents never seem ready, but damn those grandparents are!

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

Ew, Quiznos? I expected better of you, son.

[–] cRazi_man@lemm.ee 40 points 1 week ago (2 children)

This is the first time I've come across this statement..... Do dads in America actually say that?

[–] adarza@lemmy.ca 40 points 1 week ago (3 children)

it, or a variation of it, has been in some movies/tv.

never had a date's dad say anything remotely similar to me though.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

When I was 13-14 I had this best friend, named Amber. I was terribly gay, and she dreadfully lesbian. Neither one of us had admitted it to the other, or even really ourselves. But there was a connection, and everyone just assumed we were dating. Including her dad, who spent most of his time overseas. Former military, and now he's over there with some private fucking army or some shit. Absolutely terrifying man. Divorced from her mom, but stays with them whenever he's stateside.

Anyway, her mom had met me once or twice, but never in the context of us dating, which we had basically decided to just go along with. Her dad came home one week, and I was so freaked out about meeting him, because I'd heard all these stories. I went over to get her, and her dad told me to come inside.

Dude was freaky, kind of an asshole, but no over protective dad shit.

Then her mom came in the room, dad asked her if she'd met "Amber's boyfriend"

Mom was like, "yeah, but he didn't tell me he was dating my daughter"

And then she looks me dead in the eye, and with witnesses tells 14 year old me "listen, tubby, if she ends up pregnant I'll fuck your ass with her father's rifle so hard you'll spit bullets"

Her mother is so much more terrifying than her father. Super Catholic, super scary, super Chancla energy

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

This was long before I was alive, but apparently when my sister committed the act for the first time, she came home to my mom, who took a look at her and said "ohhh, she had seeeexxxxxxx!"

I'm not really sure which approach seems preferable.

[–] Zwiebel@feddit.org 7 points 1 week ago

The second one, you know where the parents genuinely love their kids

[–] PersnickityPenguin@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh I have. I had a coworker who used to brag that when his daughter had a date, he would open his garage door and start cleaning his guns so the kid would see him.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Was he Rodney Atkins?

[–] callouscomic@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

I had an uncle say shit like this to me. Weird family.

[–] cheers_queers@lemm.ee 1 points 1 week ago

my uncle had some beaver testicles hanging in his basement and he'd tell his daughter's boyfriends that they were the balls of all her exes who tried anything.

my dad sat in the living room cleaning his pistol on his lap while interrogating me about my boyfriend when i was 21 and on my own.

this stuff happens and it's gross

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago
[–] devilish666@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago
[–] cholesterol@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

So if she blows you..?

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago
[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 2 points 1 week ago