The lighter side of ADHD
More seriously, ADHD, among others, is a working memory disorder. A way to cover this is to use "prosthetics" for it, such as a notepad that you always carry with you. If this affects you strongly, train your muscle memory to use it to note down what you were planning to do and to refer to it when you forgot.
In PC-speak, ADHDers have traded RAM for more CPU.
How does writing things down help when I don't remember to read them back...?
The idea is that you can regularly check the notebook. If that doesn't work for you, then an app with a notification might be a better match
I started using todoist for this and it helped a lot.
(I'm not trying to shill this product, but I am trying to shill the idea - I'm sure there are a ton of similar products out there.)
I use it in the "getting things done" method where you drop every little thing you need to remember in the inbox and go through the inbox once a day to organize your thoughts into whatever project or container they need to be in. It has immensely improved my life and the underlying feeling of dread that you missed or forgot to do something.
I go through phases of writing things down. I do it for a week, realize I remember everything I wrote down, and get used to remembering. Then I'll think, well, this whole thing was useless, I'm just remembering it. So I get lazy, stop writing things down, and start forgetting. Repeat ad nauseum.
I do something similar for waking up on time. I'll set 8 alarms in 15 minute increments. I'll start waking up 2-3 minutes before each one, and think to myself, well this is annoying, I'm waking up on my own. So I remove most of the alarms, and then oversleep.
I find that the act of writing it down makes it more likely I remember it. And since I'm always writing everything down, I always know that I can reference anything. So there's no "remembering I wrote it down," it's always going to be there.
Writing something down increases the likelihood I will remember. It feels like there is something about listening to information that makes it difficult to remember and retain. I often forget what I was saying or lose track of what other people say in conversation.
The process of writing may activate some other part of our minds, or that because writing is slower it becomes easier to retain in memory. Any event with a heightened emotional state becomes far easier to remember. Quite mysterious.
I don't think I have adhd, but I do have pretty severe memory problems. I've managed to get into the habit of checking my notebook every time I think about and/or touch it. I always keep my book on my person, or with my phone so I don't lose it
I may have Alzheimers, but al least I don't have Alzheimers.
That's not what it feels like for me. I grew up basically getting the "what's wrong with you? Just focus" treatment, so I always default to saying to myself "no, no, it'll be okay, I'll just try really super duper hard; I'm sure it'll work this time."
Yeah exactly the same experience for me. It's not about forgetting it, it's about thinking that if you just tried a little harder you would be able to do it. Because that's what everyone kept telling me. And even now it feels like i'm using my ADHD as an excuse to be lazy.
Seconded. If it wasn't for alarm and notes apps on my phone, I'd never remember anything, let alone actually do stuff! Even paper notes wouldn't work because I'd forget that the note existed in no time flat 😂
My old boss gave me a load of shit for writing down tasks that I had to do. He just couldn't comprehend that it wouldn't stick if it wasn't written down.
He took my book from me, and then asked me to do a bunch of complicated stuff each with its own deadline.
He then got annoyed when I didn't do the stuff because I hadn't written it down because he took my book.
He got sacked, I got promoted.
Ugh, he sounds like such an asshole! I'm glad he got sacked and belated congratulations on the promotion 😁
Thanks! I'm now working in a new role where there is no more ridiculous pressure or wild expectations and have been able to commit to working on a degree (because I fucked up the first one).
Work shouldn't leave you panicking on a monday morning or crying into your lunch.
Individual paper notes won't work. What's been shown to work is a personal notebad you train yourself to carry with you always. For example by now I've trained myself by muscle memory to reach for my phone when getting up. Similar approach can be used for a notepad.
Paper notepad wouldn't work for me due to awful fine motor skills (another ADHD symptom) making my handwriting slow and cumbersome. I can write probably three times as fast on my phone where I just have to tap the letters rather than use dexterity to shape them, thus making it much less of a "stupid hand can't keep up with my brain" kind of frustration thing.
Plus back before smartphones were a thing, I always walked around with so much junk in my pocket that the notepad would take quite some time finding and fishing out, if it would even fit 😂
Of course one solution doesn't work for everyone. if you current system works for you, keep at it. I know for me, fishing the phone out my pocket, unlocking it, opening a notepad app, opening a new note and typing it badly, is probably as slow as a notepad at least. And then due to the nature of the phone, I forgot I had notes.
@Viking_Hippie @db0 I relate to this. I have a big bullet journal that I stopped using because it was too big to haul around all the time. So then I bought some field notes books but most of my shirts don’t have pockets and my jean pockets are filled of my phone, keys, wallet, AirPods plus I don’t want a pen in my pants pocket. On top of all of that my hand writing is atrocious and I too have the issue of my brain moving way faster than my hand.
@Viking_Hippie @db0 I noticed the other day that my mind has what I call “branch thoughts” that sprout as related but separate thoughts to what I’m currently trying to get out of my head. These branch thoughts usually need to be explored individually but if I do that while writing, the original thought is lost. I usually stop writing down the ideas all together because it’s just too much going on at once.
Same. I have two alarms dedicated to just 'washing machine' and 'call pharmacy' because I will forget those every single time and end up with no clean underwear and no medication. The only problem is when I'm in a situation where I can't immediately write something down and/or set an alarm for something, like when I'm in the shower. Then whatever I thought of will simply be lost to the void forever.
I wanna remember to remember to forget you forgot me
Modest Mouse lyrics always relevant
Ha! That’s a great quote, I should write it down somewhere… nah. I’ll remember it.
Good thing I have some hoarding issues too.
idk if i have adhd, i think i do but undiagnosed, i never used planners in school because i was like ill never remember to look at it and i should be able to remember what to do
i never remember what to do
I traded ram for cpu and drive space for gpu lol. No memory all processing.
That's a damn good description, 4 GB of 2600 mhz ram on a 6 GHz 64 core processor and a 20gb flash disk for a hard drive.
I don’t need a notepad cause it’s ONLY 1 thing I need to remember. That is, till the next thing 5 minutes from now…
I've been taking notes religiously at work for years. So many notes. I have gone through dozens of note pads over the years. I recently switched from paper to Microsoft To Do. Works great for my purposes since I'm on my computer most of the time anyway. No more bulky note pads with disorganized chicken scratch.
How do you keep from getting overwhelmed by the list?
My staff poke fun at me sometimes for keeping lists, but they know well by now just how close to Alzheimers I come on a daily basis.
train your muscle memory to use it
Remember Sammy Jenkins.
I rely on paper: a planner for 'do thing when' and a bullet-journaly information book. I know a lot of people like phone for this, but once I unlock the phone ... I'm on lemmy. I prefer much more immediate and focused tools for myself
This app has been a lifesaver for me. It's still taken time convince myself to use the damn thing, but the snoozable pop up in your face reminders has helped a ton!
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=alarm.clock.calendar.reminder
Love that pc analogy! 🤣
i know there isn't really a simpler term but i sure hate when adhd is used as a title or adjective. it's like saying "autistics" or "cancerers"
Adhads? The Attentionless? Deficitos?
I think writing stuff down, and especially setting notifications is highly beneficial to pretty much anyone. I think it's a great way to offload stuff from your internal brain onto external one. It's kind of relieving when I don't even need to try and remember something. I like to think that it frees up brain capacity for other things.
Like many things, whereas it's just useful for neurotypical people, it's essential for many people with ADHD.
I don't think that's the working memory. At least in my diagnosis I have extremely well functioning working memory and I excel at a lot of tasks that require to juggle with a lot of information.
However I still struggle with remembering that I need to do something after the current task if I don't put some reminder in place.
So I think it's some other part of the memory that's ... erm ... weird.
That's working memory
Or is it maybe that we simply rotate far too much stuff through the working memory? Where a "normal" person puts in two/three things and keeps a fourth on the stack, we switch our focus so often to different things, that we have to put a lot more in and out of our working memory, thereby also pushing out everything we meant to think of "later".