Whoever drew this, had never gone to an urinal in his life
this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2024
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My trick for dealing with "blushing bladder" is a Palovian response on myself. I realized I had certain pee triggers. Long story short, there are certain places and situations that cause me to need to urinate. So I figured why not use a word as a trigger? While at home I began saying the trigger word just as I felt the flow begin. Every time I pee, I say the word. My blushing bladder went away. Some of the music venues i frequent have urinals literally elbow to elbow so it's awkward but there's no trouble when I say the trigger word. The only problem now is people look at me weird when I'm looking at my dick saying "shazam".
I do the same type of thing, but I just swish saliva around in my mouth. For some reason that gets my mind off it and next thing I know, I'm peeing.
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Count the number of tiles in front of you, solve some math problems in your head, think about what to do next saturda- shit, some guy just moved next to me. Is he looking? Maybe I should pull out my phone and check lemmy. ...but then people will think I'm recording them piss, and the fact that I'm still not pissing will further justify their suspicions. Maybe I should just pretend to have a small coughing fit and that's why I can't pee. But then people will start looking, and maybe even worry I'll spray them accidentally. Oh the guy finished peeing. I'll just wait until he leaves the room then. Oh another guy just entered. Well, he doesn't know anything so I'll just pretend I finished peeing and hold it in for the rest of the day.
Look at the tiles and imagine the grout lines are an infinite grid of 1 ohm resistors. I wonder what the resistance is between two points a knight's move apart...dammit I've been standing here for hours again
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Well. This comic certainly isn't making it easier.
I sometimes think that maybe as a society we'd be better off relaxing nudity taboos or something.
I dunno even pets like dogs have to make eye contact with their owner while shitting to feel comfortable and they know nothing of our puritanical ways.
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Only sometimes?
Totally agree. Or maybe there could be a little fig leaf dispenser by the urinals so all the shy guys can hide their junk from god whilst they micturate.
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You do know it's not a requirement to use the urinal, they also have private pee booths as well.
Us normal pissers also listen to the booths when we suspect a weener-holder.
That's why I act like I'm pooping. I'll sit down and make grunt noises while aiming my piss at the side of the bowl so no one hears I'm actually peeing. Because that's less embarrassing than knowing you all think I'm too afraid to piss in front of you. I even pull toilet paper out and wipe it on my thigh so all you actual Weiner holders believe I'm wiping my ass. Who's the fool now? Not only was I too afraid to pee in front of you, I convinced you I was taking a manly shit while you probably nodded in approval at the other Weiner holders next to you. Check mate.
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That's why randomly drop change into the bowl to make people think I'm doing a twozy.
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The only evidence of the "grand gay conspiracy" people keep talking about is the existence of bath-tub (multi-user) urinals.
I haven't seen one of those since I was a kid when my redneck racist homophobic dad would drag us to the dirt track to watch other drunk rednecks race each other in their first track cars... Hang on...
I would have thought trough over tub... but i guess that depends entirely on the type of multi-user you're going for...
"Nice watch"
I've never used a urinal. it's weird and also some of them are disgusting, they almost guarantee splashback
edit: are, not ate
I said. I can't HEAR YOU PISS!
I can’t get the ur-eye-nal pronunciation from disco elysium out of my head