this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2023
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I fully understand wanting to avoid self-diagnoses for attention seeking or blame avoiding purposes, but I tend to lean towards believing people first.
One, because there is always going to be a discrepancy between the population of the accurately diagnosed and people who have a condition, because of poor access to mental health, because of the stigma attached with seeking help for and admitting to having a disorder, cultural differences in diagnoses and because there are poorly trained mental health professionals.
And two, because rejecting people outright when they share what may or may not be a serious problem they’re facing puts them on the defensive and tells people in the vicinity that you may not be a safe person or contribute to a safe place to express themselves.
The average person is going to be doubtful anyways, unless you fit into their understanding of your expressed condition. How many times have we heard “how could he kill himself, he seemed so happy?”
I didn't get my audhd dx until i was 28 but i feel like i always knew, and i think my life might've been sightly less miserable in general if id just allowed myself to accept a self-diagnosis. the attitude of "you just want to be special" seriously fucked me up lmfao.
It's just some gatekeeping bullshit.
In the worst case, they want to kick anyone they don't like to keep their identity pure and clean (newsflash: any group that extends to 1% of the population is going to include people you don't like).
In the best case, they think that any official institution is going to dedicate significant resources to support someone without an official diagnosis, the kind of tactics that the far right uses all the time to make one minority fight against another.
Completely agree with this. Also, as this meme suggests, most people who are autistic don't really need to say it out loud for people who know what autism is to know they have it. You don't need a diagnosis to exhibit behaviors that are obvious to everyone else around you. A diagnosis doesn't suddenly make you something you weren't already.
It takes a strong support system to accept and embrace that their child is autistic and a firm commitment for the entire rest of their childhood to doing whats best for the within that context. The amount of parents who simply outright reject that "something might be wrong" with their kid is extremely high, even now. That doesn't make the kid any less autistic because they haven't been diagnosed, and it doesn't make their symptoms any less obvious either.
Yes, hopefully people can get diagnosed, and hopefully your city has adequate resources to help them, and hopefully the parents aren't jerks, and hopefully the place you live isn't full of conspiracy theorists and crackpot religious leaders who think just praying for the kid is good enough. Hopefully. But if not, you just might have an undiagnosed autistic teenager who's life is spinning out of control and the last thing they need is some internet expert's dumb ass telling them there is nothing wrong because they didn't get the magical diagnosis. Speaking from experience.
Try it anyway.
Your argument is that self-diagnosis causes the average person to be doubtful of expressed diagnoses. Mine is that it’s not self-diagnosis, it’s expression outside of what the average person understands a condition to be that has them doubting.
And yes, I have been diagnosed and then been told that the diagnosis was wrong because I don’t “fit” what people think. So, yeah, I have tried, and that’s why I’m making the argument I am, because that’s what happened. If your experience has been better…great? Maybe you fit the mold better than I do.
It isn't.
My argument is that official diagnosis validates the claim and adds to its gravity.
I agree with you on that point.