this post was submitted on 01 Jul 2023
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I was born and raised in America, and for some reason I have this classic notion in my head that people should be dancing at weddings.

However, now that many of my friends from earlier in life and college are getting married, when I go to those weddings, the dance, if they even have one, is on a tiny dance floor, maybe even just a small part of their reception hall that they scooted the chairs and tables out away from.

And it turns out, many people simply don't know how to dance. Sure, not everyone is a competitive ballroom dancer, but even my non-dancer friends in college would still go to swing dancing night and mess around on the dance floor.

Now, however, people just stand on the dance floor and sway or shuffle. I am loth to even call it dancing. It just seems like people are uncomfortable and not really having fun.

What happened? Did people stop dancing?


PS: Please check out the dance community for more dance related content. I just created it and would greatly appreciate some help with getting it off the ground!


Edit: "am loathe" -> "am loth". STT is a b.

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[–] theinspectorst@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm late 30s, and formal dancing like this isn't something I'm into or have any close friends who are into - so this isn't something that's just happened suddenly with your generation. I don't think my parents know how to dance in any formal way either. This isn't some sudden loss of culture.

Most of the Western weddings I've gone to have a 'first dance' (where often the couple may have taken some lessons beforehand and which will therefore be more formal) but then after that the band or DJ will play pop/rock/hip-hop/disco music and everyone else will dance along to that. But that's dancing in the sense of how the vast majority of people (who have never taken lessons) know how to dance - i.e. the informal way we all learnt to dance at school discos or student parties or nightclubs - not the more structured dancing styles you're describing.

It sounds like you're quite into dancing as a hobby, given you mention having friends from swing dancing nights - but most people aren't, it's a bit of a niche. So you're disappointed that your hobby isn't more mainstream, but I wouldn't go blaming that on your fellow wedding guests. I'm quite into Star Trek, but when I go to weddings I don't grumble that the bride didn't walk down the aisle to the TNG theme.

My advice would be to accept that your hobby isn't something that most people are in to and not to judge other people for that. Instead seek out clubs and societies for people who do share you interest, where you can ballroom dance the night away together.

[–] DrYes@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

People just don't do Beatzoid weddings anymore :(

[–] theinspectorst@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

The swing dancing at Betazoid weddings is something to behold.

[–] Hatchet@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

Don't worry, there's no blame or judgment or anger. There is simply a misalignment of expectations, and I am trying to derive the source of that discontinuity.